Idea People Comic Strips - Page 4

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

1000 Results for Idea People

View 31 - 40 results for idea people comic strips. Discover the best "Idea People" comics from Dilbert.com.

Recurring Charges

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Recurring Charges - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business, #technology, #cancel, #online, #charges, #information, #automated phone system, #contact, #website, #microphone

View Transcript

Transcript

dilbert at home: i'm going to try to cancel some recurring online charges today. wish me luck. dogbert: what resistance are you expecting? dilbert: obviously, they hide their contact information, so i allocated two hours to find the right phone number. it should take about an hour to navigate their automated phone system that will keep sending me to the wrong place. if i reach a human, he'll try to divert me to their website to cancel, which i already know won't work because... ...i won't be able to find my account in their system for reasons no one will ever be able to explain. and of course, their phone support person will be using a headset microphone that garbles his already mumbled words. dogbert: but if you stick with it, you will eventually succeed? dilbert: i don't know were you got that idea.

They Said You'd Say That

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
They Said You'd Say That - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business, #office workers, #government, #bald, #people, #camps, #internment camp, #believe, #false

View Transcript

Transcript

tina: i saw on the news that the government plans to round up all bald people and out them in camps. wally: you should be embarrassed for believing a story so obviously false. tina: they said you'd say that.

Wally Does Three Jobs

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Wally Does Three Jobs - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business, #money, #fortune, #employer, #employment, #working from home, #job, #manage, #expectations, #people

View Transcript

Transcript

wally and dilbert on video conference call. wally: i'm making a fortune working from home. three different employers think i work only for them. dilbert: how do you do three jobs at the same time: wally: it comes down to managing other people's expectations.

Wally Makes A Suggestion

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Wally Makes A Suggestion - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business, #managers & supervisors, #sarcasm, #technology, #product idea, #idea, #debunk

View Transcript

Transcript

wally: did you see my brilliant product idea i emailed to you? boss: yes, i already debunked it in my mind. wally: perhaps you could share your reasons. boss: if it's such a great idea. why isn't someone else doing it? and if someone is already doing it, we are far too late. in order for your idea to be good, i would have to think you are smarter than everyone in the industry. and seriously, just look at you. anyone else have an idea? others: nope. nope, never. nope.

Bad Attitude

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Bad Attitude - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business, #technology, #work, #exceptional, #complain, #attitude, #bad, #dislike, #sarcasm

View Transcript

Transcript

boss: your work has been exceptional, but people are complaining about your attitude. dilbert: aren't the people who are doing the complaining usually the ones with bad attitudes. boss: they think you dislike them. dilbert: i do, but i have a terrific attitude about it.

Trust Coworkers

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Trust Coworkers - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business, #managers & supervisors, #trust, #pretend, #different

View Transcript

Transcript

in office building boss: okay, team. we can get this done if we trust each other. alice: that's not a thing. dilbert: i don't trust any of you. boss: maybe we can pretend. dilbert: i'd need to pretend we're different people.

5 G Is 4 G

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
5 G Is 4 G - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business, #managers & supervisors, #technology, #wireless, #service, #5g, #4g, #complain, #impossible, #phone

View Transcript

Transcript

boss: we are rolling out our new 5G wireless service today. dilbert: we don't have any 5G technology. boss: it's really 4G, but no one wants that, so we call it 5G. dilbert: people will complain. boss: that's okay. we're also making it impossible to reach us by phone.

Dogbert Does Telemedicine

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Dogbert Does Telemedicine - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business, #technology, #telemedicine, #time, #doctor, #health, #pain, #rake, #leaves, #medicine

View Transcript

Transcript

dogbert: i started doing telemedicine in my spare time. Dilbert: don't you need to be a doctor to do that? dogbert: technically, yes. but i found a workaround. dilbert: which is? dogbert: i tell people i'm a doctor. patient: doctor, i have a sharp pain in the back of my thigh. dogbert: are you sitting on a rake? patient: that's a weird question. oh. wait, i am. what should i do? dogbert: try picking up leaves with your hands.

Protestors Destroy Our Stores

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Protestors Destroy Our Stores - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #protest movements, #protestors, #retail, #stores, #destroy, #hate, #cause, #donate, #context

View Transcript

Transcript

dilbert: all of our retail locations were destroyed by protesters last night. why do they hate us? dilbert: they don't hate us. we donate to their cause. dilbert: am i missing some context? boss: you should see what they do to the people they don't like.

Real Men Multitask

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Real Men Multitask  - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business, #managers & supervisors, #technology, #software, #software design, #concentrate, #multitask, #distraction, #kill, #error

View Transcript

Transcript

boss: do you ever think about the fact that one small error in your software design could kill hundreds of people? all it would take is some kind of distraction while you are trying to concentrate. dilbert: are you done? boss: a real man could multitask in this situation.