Issues Comic Strips - Page 4

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65 Results for Issues

View 31 - 40 results for issues comic strips. Discover the best "Issues" comics from Dilbert.com.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 20, 2008's comic on:


Tags #not attracted, #long enough, #fix things, #tech support, #use abilities, #no action

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Tina: I'm not attracted to you, but I'd like to date you for one month. That should be long enough to resolve any tech support issues on my home computer, cell phone and home theater." Dilbert: Would there be any kissing? Tina: What kind of girl do you think I am?

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 26, 2008's comic on:


Tags #due diligence, #hidden issues, #bad time, #human buns

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The Boss says, "Dilbert, I need you to handle the due diligence for our alliance with the galactic protein corporation." The Boss says, "Find out if they have any hidden issues we should know about." Dilbert says, "Is this a bad time?" Human Buns

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 22, 2007's comic on:


Tags #use old technology, #get funded, #raise issue, #any issues, #old technology, #works fine, #new technology buggy

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Alice: Our pointy-haired boss is insisting we use old technology because he thinks it will be easier to get it funded. "You should raise that issue at the meeting." "We'll back you up." Dilbert: "Absolutely." The Boss: "Are there any issues?" Asok: "You're making us use old technology just to make your job easier." "Does anyone else think that?" "No." "No." "No." "The old technology works fine." "New technology is too buggy." "What was that?!!" "It's just something we do."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 23, 2007's comic on:


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Phew. This has been a long meeting. Does anyone have any other issues? "I..." PUNCH "We have a motion to adjourn."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 04, 2007's comic on:


Tags #diet, #eating disorder, #first 20 pounds, #diet with buddy, #lose weight, #weight issues, #health

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The Boss: My doctor says it will be easier if I diet with a buddy. Do you want in on this? Tina: Good lord. I think I just developed an eating disorder! The Boss: They say the first 20 pounds are the easiest. Tina: NOT HELPING!"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 23, 2006's comic on:


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"Wally, I've documented all of your disciplinary issues in your personnel file." "You have violations for every letter of the alphabet except Z. For some reason you missed that one." Zzzzzz

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 25, 2006's comic on:


Tags #outsourcing, #language, #translation, #trade off, #cheap, #money

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My Elbonian factory can manufacture your product for pennies. "Is there any downside?" "Minor translation issues." "They either said 'plastic' or 'the spleen of a pig-footed bandicoot.'" "We don't have any plastic." SPLEENS

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 25, 2005's comic on:


Tags #astonishing incompetence, #stars of project, #issues

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The Boss: "Alice, what's the status of your project?" Alice: "The astonishing incompetence of others caused me to jump through a window and land in a dumpster." The Boss: "So then, no issues?"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 12, 2004's comic on:


Tags #cubicle vampire, #happy coowrkers, #in search of, #talk, #work related issues, #life drained, #gut instinct, #you're hire

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Job interview "What's your biggest weakness." "I'm a cubicle vampire." "I wander the cubicles in search of happy coworkers." "Then I pounce!" "Then you suck their blood?" "That was the old way." "I talk about work-related issues until the life is drained from their bodies." "I'm going to trust my gut instinct on this. You're hired." "Have you met the new hire yet?"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 22, 2004's comic on:


Tags #great 3 hour meeting, #strategic core issues, #gibberish

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It's been a great three-hour meeting but I have one question. Can a business - led project management process optimize our static core issues? Was that gibberish? I thought thats what we are doing.