Network Comic Strips - Page 4
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111 Results for Network
View 31 - 40 results for network comic strips. Discover the best "Network" comics from Dilbert.com.
Wednesday August 27,
2014
Tags thinking, technology problem, executive attention netowrk, social awareness, radical change, sarcasm
Transcript
Dilbert: I have to warn you that I'll be going deep on a technology problem today. I'll be using the executive attention network of my brain at the expense of my social awareness. Boss: Sounds like a radical change. Dilbert: I can't tell if that was sarcasm.
Saturday August 09,
2014
Tags friendship, managers & supervisors, netwrok, career, weird and creepy, send email, best friend, relationships, business
Transcript
Asok: Would you mind if I network with you to help my career? Boss: I would have said yes, but you made it feel all weird and creepy. Perhaps you could send me email that I won't read. Asok: That makes you my best friend!
Saturday March 02,
2013
Tags conversation, upgrade, unstable network, risks, folksy response, break eggs
Transcript
Dilbert: The upgrade could make our network unstable. Boss: You can't make an omelet without breaking some eggs. Dilbert: I interpret your folksy response to mean I should upgrade the network despite the risks. Boss: No, I'm saying I'll break your eggs if the network goes down.
Tuesday January 01,
2013
Tags new year's day, optimism, network down, bad new years day, good year
Transcript
Dilbert: A fresh new year is upon us and I am brimming with optimism. Ugh. Our network at work is down because my pointy-haired boss wouldn't let me upgrade the software. Now I need to work all night to fix it. Maybe this means the next 364 days will be extra awesome. Dogbert: Yeah. That's how it works.
Tuesday September 04,
2012
Tags computer software, managers & supervisors, budget, work monitoring software, calendar, year 2040, square boxes, business
Transcript
Boss: I don't have a budget for the network monitoring software you need, so you'll have to write it yourself. Dilbert: Good plan. I'll check back with you when I'm done doing that. What's your calendar look like in the year 2040? Boss: Sort of a grid with square boxes.
Saturday July 21,
2012
Tags computer software, inventions, 3d network, motion sensors, sneezed, merged network, 15th of cisco
Transcript
In the near future Wally: I was manipulating a 3-D network model using my hand motion sensors. It was all good until I sneezed and accidentally merged my network design with my outlook calendar. Boss: When will you have that fixed? Wally: I should be done by... the 15th of Cisco.
Sunday July 01,
2012
Tags extensive plastic surgery, face, gadgets, information services, office equipment, swine, to log on
Transcript
Mordac: I am Mordac, the preventer of information services. Dilbert: I know. We've worked together for years. Mordac: And it still sounds awesome when I say it. Anyway, I up-graded our network security to include facial recognition. Your temporary password is this face. You'll need extensive plastic surgery to log on the first time. Dilbert: You've gone too far, Mordac! I will escalate this! Boss: I wish we'd had this conversation a week ago.
Friday April 20,
2012
Tags business ethics, competitors network, elbonians, bribe blogger, limited capacity, self control, bury in woods
Transcript
Boss: Can you hack into our competitor's network and make it look as if the Elbonians did it? Dilbert: No. Boss: Can you bribe a blogger to write good things about our company? Dilbert: No. Boss: Now that I've worn down your limited capacity for self-control, I need you to bury something in the woods, no questions asked. Dilbert: Fine.
Sunday December 25,
2011
Tags christmas presents, embarrassment, merry christmas, network design meeting, brand of makeup, hid, loobby, elevator, closet for months, creepiness
Transcript
Dilbert: Merry Christmas, Sarah. This is for you. Woman: Have you met? Dilbert: We attended the same network design meeting last April. I overheard you telling someone in the hallway that you like a specific brand of makeup. So I bought a box of it and kept it in the closet for months. I came to work early today and hid behind the sculpture in the lobby until I saw you heading to the elevator. Alice: I didn't know you could gift wrap creepiness. Sorry. Just act like I'm not here.
Wednesday July 20,
2011
Tags hardware, internet & world wide web, next week balancing, traffic loads, network, worst wingman, shame
Transcript
Wally: Is it okay if I spend the next week balancing traffic loads on our newtork? Asok: I thought I told you that our hardware vendor already did that. Wally: Worst wingman ever. Asok: Shame is my name!


