Nothing To Fear Comic Strips - Page 4
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Man: Wow, that's a great idea. Let's just do that! LOL! Dilbert: I've noticed that you are nothing but an empty vessel for transporting sarcasm. Man: Oooh! I'm such an empty vessel! LOL! Dilbert: I don't know what to do with all of this.
Carol: Do you have any New Year's resolutions? Dilbert: I resolve to not make major decisions about my life based on random calendar dates. Carol: So...nothing about your weight? Dilbert: Worst holiday ever.
Dilbert: I accomplished nothing this week because my idiot co-workers continue to use their speakerphones in the office. This is compounded by the fact that my idiot boss doesn't allow me to work from home. If you need me, I'll be sitting in my cubicle doing nothing but waiting for other people's phone calls to end.
Dilbert: Have you made a decision on my project yet? The Boss: No, but I asked my boss for his input. Dilbert: Did you inadequately explain the situation as usual? The Boss: Maybe. Dilbert: Thanks for all the nothing.
Man: I heard you were criticizing me behind my back. Try saying those things to my face! Dilbert: Okay. You're a hot-headed know-nothing who uses his arrogance to mask his total lack of talent. You ruin every meeting with your toxic personality. Every project you touch turns to garbage you're like a plague with legs. Man: Okay... That was harsh, but I respect you for speaking truth to power. Dilbert: You don't have any power. Man: Maybe it's better if you talk behind my back.
Alice: I accomplished nothing this week because I'm addicted to apps on my phone. I haven't slept in three days because of my "Fortnite" habit. The Boss: What about the rest of you losers? Asok: Shhh. I got a one-ear podcast going here.
Dilbert: I invented a device that can read your thoughts and turn them into computer commands. The Boss: Nothing is happening. Is it broken? Dilbert: That's one of my top two theories.
Alice: Is it true you are telling everyone the new product road map is stupid? Dilbert: Um... nothing remotely like that has ever happened. Here's an email in which I say how good it is. Alice: You hesitated in your answer. That means you're lying. Dilbert: Read the email!!!