Passion Fro Success Comic Strips - Page 4

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192 Results for Passion Fro Success

View 31 - 40 results for passion fro success comic strips. Discover the best "Passion Fro Success" comics from Dilbert.com.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags team, teamwork, collaboration, excuses, group project, business

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Dilbert: Thank you all for coming. I'm hoping we can make a lot of progress in the next hour. Alice; I didn't get any sleep last night, so don't expect much from me. Asok: I'm so hungry I can barely think. Man 1: I might be a bit distracted today because my wife told me she wants to leave me. Wally: I can't stay for the whole meeting. I have another thing in a few minutes Man 2: I'm only here to sabotage your project because I can't abide the success of others. Dilbert; Why don't all of you leave now and I'll make all the decisions myself. Boss: How'd the team meeting go? Dilbert: Better than I expected.

Meeting Rooms Are Booked

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Meeting Rooms Are Booked  - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags meetings, managers, scheduling, conflict

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Dilbert: My project stalled because all of our meeting rooms have been reserved by managers just in case they need them. My current plan for success is to wait until one of you dies sow e can use your meeting room. Boss: Let's not do project status reports anymore.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags add code, corporate scamming, darkest day, designed new prodcut, draft apology, engineering success, make unrelaible, no upgarde, press release, ten years

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Dilbert: Ive designed our new product to work flawlessly for up to ten years. CEO: No one will need an upgrade. Thats no good. Add some code to low it down and make it unreliable after two years. CEO: But make sure the device doesn't slow down until we have an upgrade to sell. Then draft an apology I can put un a press realize when we get caught. Dilbert: You have turned my engineering success into the darkest day of my career. CEO: Thats not even close to being true. Your darkest day will be when the press figures out what we did and I fore you for it.

User Specifications Are Not Complete

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User Specifications Are Not Complete  - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags user specifications, apps, build app, no hope, fantasize

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Dilbert: are these user specifications complete? Ted: No, I plan to add requirements as you build the app until you have no hope of success and you fantasize about strangling me. Dilbert: Do you know what isn't as refreshing as you'd hope? Dogbert: Honesty?

Success Diminishes Other Guy

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Success Diminishes Other Guy   - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags ideas, diminshed, support, stab me, great deas, discussion, argument

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Ted: Your idea is great, but I plan to oppose it because I feel diminished by the success of others. Dilbert: Maybe you could support it now and then stab me in the back later. Ted: That's two great ideas you've had today. Dilbert: thank you.

Boss Loses Wife And Money

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Boss Loses Wife And Money  - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags role model, aspiration, gambler, gambling, money, Win, Lose, success, quitter

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Boss: It's not easy being a professional gambler. I lost a million dollars and my wife in one week. But I don't want to be a quitter because I know you see me as a role model. Carol: My role model is your wife. Boss: You like quitters?

Boss Gets A Troll

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Boss Gets A Troll  - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags troll, social media, trolling, insult, technology

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Boss: This idiot keeps insulting me on social media! Every time I block him, he returns with a new account. It's like he never has anything better to do. Dilbert: Do you have a new hobby? Wally: It's more like a passion.

Robots In Management

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Robots In Management - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags managers, loopholes, robot, automation, murder, killing, productivity

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Boss: Our experiment with robots in management has been a success. Productivity is way up since they started killing the low-performing humans. CEO: But... that's murder. Boss: Only when humans do it. We found a loophole.

No Path To Success

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No Path To Success - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags collusion, russia, donald trump, blame, accusation, public opinion

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Alice: I hear you're a corporate spy for our Elbonian competitors. Dilbert: No, that was an unfounded rumor. Alice: That's exactly what guilty people say. Dilbert: I'm not seeing my path to success here.

Wally's Invention Is The Best Seller Ever

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Wally's Invention Is The Best Seller Ever - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags success, Promotion, management, work, laziness

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Boss: The product you accidentally invented is our biggest seller in company history. So I'm promoting you to a leadership position. Wally: Phew! I thought you were going to make me work.