Recognize Stupidity Comic Strips - Page 4

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

87 Results for Recognize Stupidity

View 31 - 40 results for recognize stupidity comic strips. Discover the best "Recognize Stupidity" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 14, 2009's comic on:


Tags #ridiculous, #waste, #time, #pointing, #useless, #stupidity

View Transcript

Transcript

Man says, "Someone borrowed the unit you asked to see, so I'll show you pictures of models you aren't interested in." Man says, "There's one you don't want?And you sure don't want that one?" Dilbert says, "And how does this help?" Man says, "Would you like a CD of products we no longer carry?"

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 09, 2009's comic on:


Tags #presentation, #problem, #scenario, #ridiculous, #stupidity

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert says, "Our new data center is complete." Dilbert says, "The only wrinkle is that the power company won't give us the kilowatts we need." The boss says, "What are our options?" Dilbert says, "Well, we can run the servers without air conditioning." Dilbert says, "Until they melt into a toxic blob." Dilbert says, "Then we can turn the building into a museum that celebrates poor planning." Dilbert says, "Or we could all quit our jobs and eat bugs to survive." The boss says, "Let's go with the toxic blob, but we need to call it something else." Man says, "Convergence!"

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 27, 2009's comic on:


Tags #reading, #response, #customer service, #ridiculous, #ridicule, #stupidity

View Transcript

Transcript

Tina says, "Can you review my letter to this customer who complained?" Dilbert says, "'Tell the spiders living in your skull that we'll look into it.'" Tina says, "Good writing should never be predictable." Dilbert says, "Then it's perfect."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 25, 2009's comic on:


Tags #assignment, #stupidity, #yelling, #Advice, #reading

View Transcript

Transcript

The boss says, "Tina, answer this customer complaint. And remembert, the customer is always an idiot." Tina says, "I think you mean the customer is always?um?oh my?" The boss says, "Quick! Pop your ears so your head doesn't explode!" Gurk!

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 22, 2009's comic on:


Tags #work, #assignment, #completed, #checking, #ridicule, #stupidity

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert says, "The prototype is done. Come take a look at the user interface." The boss says, "It works great, but make sure this thing is totally idiot-proof." Dilbert says, "Again?"

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 09, 2009's comic on:


Tags #compensation, #pay, #money, #bonus, #denial, #rejection, #confused, #stupidity, #cruel

View Transcript

Transcript

The boss says, "I can't give you a bonus because another division had huge losses." Dilbert says, "Remind me again why my bonus is tied to the performance of strangers?" The boss says, "I shouldn't tell you this, but we model our compensation program after practical jokes."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 07, 2009's comic on:


Tags #meeting, #rules, #ridiculous, #nervous, #shaking, #worried, #stupidity, #business

View Transcript

Transcript

The boss says, "We won a huge government contract." The boss says, "Now we need to follow all of our company policies plus every government procurement rule." Dilbert says, "I feel like I'm being smothered by a damp mattress!" The boss says, "That's what victory feels like!"

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 05, 2009's comic on:


Tags #worried, #scared, #stupidity, #shaking, #cruel, #economy

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert says, "I'm worried that I won't get a raise this year." The boss says, "You shouldn't worry about that." The boss says, "You should worry that you might lose your job in the next round of layoffs." Dilbert says, "I should worry about that???" The boss says, "Well...probably not." The boss says, "It makes more sense to worry about the entire company going out of business." The boss says, "And that's nothing if the global economy collapses." The boss says, "Maybe you should worry that the only viable livelihood of the future invokes cannibalism." Dogbert says, "Are you still worried about not getting a raise?" Dilbert says, "Not so much."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 30, 2009's comic on:


Tags #typing, #lazy, #idea, #trick, #deception, #managing, #stupidity

View Transcript

Transcript

Wally says, "I programmed my instant-messaging software to send random questions to our boss every hour." Wally says, "They're all yes or no questions so he'll have the illusion of managing me." Computer says, "Should I rotate the domain protocols so they wear out evenly?" The boss says, "Yes"

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 17, 2009's comic on:


Tags #stealing, #stupidity, #confronting, #ridiculous, #pirate

View Transcript

Transcript

Man says, "It's a conflict of interest for you to be our CEO and also a pirate who kidnaps our employees." Dogbert says, "The executive compensation committee approved this arrangement. It's all spelled out in my employment agreement." Man says, "So it is." Dogbert says, "Wait here while I call myself and ransom you back to the office."