Role Model Comic Strips - Page 4
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Character
93 Results for Role Model
View 31 - 40 results for role model comic strips. Discover the best "Role Model" comics from Dilbert.com.
Saturday March 13,
2010
Tags meeting, cmmi, confused, model, framework, budget, guessing, front shot, business
Transcript
The Boss says, "We're going to use CMMI. It's a model for developing a process to creat a framework." The Boss says, "Or it might be a process for creating a framework to make a model." The Boss says, "There's no budget for training, so we'll be relying on guessing more than usual."
Thursday July 09,
2009
Tags compensation, pay, money, bonus, denial, rejection, confused, stupidity, cruel
Transcript
The boss says, "I can't give you a bonus because another division had huge losses." Dilbert says, "Remind me again why my bonus is tied to the performance of strangers?" The boss says, "I shouldn't tell you this, but we model our compensation program after practical jokes."
Monday June 29,
2009
Tags sitting, news, deception, evil
Transcript
Dilbert says, "Sales are tanking because our online reviews are awful." The boss says, "Cripple a feature and change the model number so the online reviews look stale." Dilbert says, "Wow. That was a lot of evil packed into one sentence." The boss says, "Thank you."
Saturday June 20,
2009
Tags sitting, aspirations, plan, ridicule, grumpy
Transcript
Wally says, "My dream is to someday be like you." Wally says, "I hope to advance from being totally worthless to being totally worthless and overpaid." Dilbert says, "How's your role model?" Wally says, "Grumpy."
Tuesday June 16,
2009
Tags meeting, explaining, pirate, plan, scheme, uncertainty, business
Transcript
Dogbert the CEO Dogbert says, "I'm taking a side job as a pirate." Dogbert says, "I'll kidnap employees and authorize huge ransom payments to myself for their return." The boss says, "Then you'll return them safely?" Dogbert says, "That's a different business model."
Wednesday May 13,
2009
Tags drinking, coffee, crime, talking, shivering, disturbing
Transcript
Wally dabbles in crime Wally says, "A lot of people think crime is a bad thing." Wally says, "But it all depends on how you pick your role models." Wally says, "I lean toward governors, bankers, athletes and sith lords." Dilbert says, "I feel a coldness."
Sunday February 15,
2009
Tags reprimand, ridiculous, unwanted, confused, group
Transcript
A woman says, "Wally, we'd like to transition your role in this project." woman says, "During the first week, you were the lead engineer." woman says, "Going forward, you'll be in more of an advisory role." woman says, "And by that I mean we have a restraining order against you." woman says, "You're not allowed within 100 yards of the conference room." woman says, "We've changed our cell phone numbers and e-mail addresses." woman says, "And we're all having reconstructive surgery so you won't recognize us in the hallway." The boss says, "Did you accomplish anything this week?" Wally says, "Mary, is that you?"
Saturday January 17,
2009
Tags help, Advice, fear, thinking, role model
Transcript
Dilbert says, "I have no project. Do you need any help with yours?" Asok says, "No. If I finish my project too soon, I might become like you." Dilbert says, "Can you make a different face when you imagine being like me?" Asok says, "I'm trying but I can't."
Friday May 30,
2008
Tags management potentail, turtle, attacked by hawk
Transcript
Catbert says, "I will use role play to evaluate your management potential. Catbert says, "Imagine you are a turtle and you are being attacked by a hawk." Catbert says, "That's better than I expected." A man says, "Thanks."
Thursday May 29,
2008
Tags evil director, human resources, evaluate job applicants, unqualified loser, nailing it, business
Transcript
Catbert: Evil director of human resources Catbert: "I like to use role play to evaluate job applicants." Pretend you're an unqualified loser. Wow. You're totally nailing it."


