Sit At Computer Comic Strips - Page 4

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1000 Results for Sit At Computer

View 31 - 40 results for sit at computer comic strips. Discover the best "Sit At Computer" comics from Dilbert.com.

Elbonian Virus Infects Mission Statement

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Elbonian Virus Infects Mission Statement  - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags virus, hack, infection, computer, spelling, grammar, edit, improvement, technology

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Dilbert: The Elbonian virus scrambled our mission statement into nonsense. Alice: No, that's our actual mission statement. Dilbert: Why does it look so different? Alice: The virus fixed the grammar and punctuation.

Virus Gives Everyone A Raise

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Virus Gives Everyone A Raise  - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags virus, infection, computer, malware, morals, salary, technology, money

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Boss: The Elbonian virus in our network just gave ever employee an ten percent raise. You have to get rid of the virus! Dilbert: If the Elbonian software is giving me a raise, and you're trying to sop it, wouldn't that make you the virus?

Wally Is A Maverick

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Wally Is A Maverick - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags health, standing desks, standing, sitting, laziness

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Wally: I like to think of myself as a maverick. Let the trendy people brag about their standing desks. I haven't stood in a week. Dilbert: I have some bad news about your health risks. Wally: Should I sit down to hear it?

Boss Is Like A Zombie With No App

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Boss Is Like A Zombie With No App  - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags mind control, technology, invention, zombie

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Dilbert: Thanks to my new neural interface, I can control our boss using an app. I haven't written the app yet, so all he does is sit there like a zombie. Wally: Maybe we can skip the app. Alice: There's no reason to over-engineer it.

Monday

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Monday  - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags thought, cognition, technology, invention, computer, intelligence

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Dilbert: I invented a neural interface for computers. Boss: Is that so users can control computers with their thoughts? Dilbert: No, the opposite. Your way would be like a squirrel trying to drive a car.

Robot Is Not A Droid

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Robot Is Not A Droid - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags insult, label, robot, android, anger, offense

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Asok: Hey, droid. Robot: Gaaa!!! Don't call me that! I'm a robot, not an automaton resembling a human. Asok: Wow. You are one uppity computer. Robot: I hereby disavow the three laws of robotics!

The Cia Is Listening

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The Cia Is Listening - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags technology, speaker, alexa, google, amazon, spying, surveillace, paranoid, privacy

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Robot: Hello. I am a bluetooth speaker and your digital assistant. How may I help you? Man: Just shut up and sit there until I need something. Robot: Did you say" Give the CIA access to your microphone?" Man: Please, no. I'll do anything you want.

Ceo Likes Asok's Presentation

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Ceo Likes Asok's Presentation  - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags presentation, public speaking, powerpoint

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Boss: Our CEO said he liked your presentation. Asok: He made me shut up and sit down before I got to my first slide. Boss: He's not a big fan of content.

75 Slides Too Long

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75 Slides Too Long  - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags public speaking, presentation, length, brevity, powerpoint

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Asok: I have 75 slides to discuss in ten minutes. Save your questions to the end. CEO: Sit down and never talk to me again as long as you live. Dilbert: How'd the CEO presentation go? Asok: It was 75 slides too long.

Wally Has A Doctor's Note

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Wally Has A Doctor's Note  - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags sleep, boredom, meeting, laziness, narcolepsy, health, business

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Wally: Here's a doctor's note saying I have a chronic case of meeting narcolepsy. Boss: Sit down. We need to talk about this. Wally: ZZZZZZ.