Stand On Stool Comic Strips - Page 4
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Character
218 Results for Stand On Stool
View 31 - 40 results for stand on stool comic strips. Discover the best "Stand On Stool" comics from Dilbert.com.
Thursday March 11,
2010
Tags eat donut, doughnut, feng shui, workflow energy, project, stack of papers, design specs, angry, superstition, science
Transcript
Wally says, "It's good Feng Shui to stand next to you because you absorb the workflow energy." Alice says, "What?" The Boss says, "I need someone to check all of these design specs before tomorrow morning." Wally says, "Some people call it superstition, but I'm pretty sure it's a science."
Top Dilbert Searches
marketing, project, cloud, catbert, leadership, budget, birthday, engineer, time sheet, sales, wally, strategy, dogbert, powerpoint, project management, topper, leader, boss, change, meeting, data, management, mordac
Friday March 05,
2010
Tags walk, outside, project, budget, executive cancel, wag tail, evil, cure, incompetence, back shot, stand on stump
Transcript
Dilbert says, "We realized our project can't work even if we execute it perfectly." Dilbert says, "Our boss' plan is to go over budget, attract attention, and hope an executive cancels our project for his own political reasons." Dogbert says, "Now do you agree that evil is the cure for incompetence?" Dilbert says, "Don't make me say it."
Wednesday March 03,
2010
Tags victor, project, goat head, upset, angry, awful, slap, help, ask, wind up, stand on one leg, cringe, hard hit, dolphin head, change species, seeing stars, messy hair
Transcript
Asok says, "Alice, a horrible accident has given me a goat head. I need you to slap me so hard that I change species from the neck up." Alice says, "Hold still, Asok. This might take a few tries." Two Hours Later Alice says, "Dolphin is close! One more should do it."
Friday March 20,
2009
Tags suggestion, improvements, ridicule, ignoring
Transcript
The boss says, ""Thanks for the suggestion. I will think about it and get back to you." Tina says, "Why do I have the feeling that you are actively forgetting my suggestion as I stand here?" Tina said, "Your head is where ideas go to die." The boss thinks, "I like pie."
Tuesday March 03,
2009
Tags meeting, colors, useless, hatred, complaining, business
Transcript
The boss says, "At the value stream stand up meeting, all status reports must be in the form of red, yellow, or green." Mauve Ecru Cerulean Puce the boss says, "Sometimes the only point of a meeting is to remind me how much I hate them."
Tuesday April 15,
2008
Tags 5 minute huddle, high energy, standup meeting, solved in minute
Transcript
The Boss: I want the entire staff to meet at 10 A.M. every day for a five-minute huddle. The Boss: We'll use this high-energy stand-up meeting to solve problems and share successes. The Boss: Who has a problem that can be solved in a minute?"Wally: I'm tired. Can I sit on you?"
Wednesday December 12,
2007
Tags coffe pot, coffee stand, offcie, yell, order coffee, quality of life, taste better
Transcript
Carol: "Don't you dare take another cup of coffee." "The more you drink, the more often I have to order coffee. You are destroying my quality of life!" "Gaaa!!!" Wally: "If this doesn't make the coffee taste better, I don't know what will."
Monday December 18,
2006
Transcript
"I got your overly brief e-mail, which obviously means you hate me and everything I stand for!" "I was in a hurry and didn't want to make you wait for a reply." "Well, okay, but I still have residual hatred that I'll need to transfer to some other aspect of your personality." "Fair enough."
Sunday October 22,
2006
Transcript
Catbert: Evil Director of Human Resources "Our employee onboarding process will get you all mainstreamed in no time at all." "This will be your cubicle, if we can find another place to store this junk." "You'll get a phone and a computer if the budget ever gets approved." "This is Alice. She will be your mentor." "I don't have time to babysit! I'm buried in work!" "I do not like you. I...do...not...like you!!!" "Stand in the hallway and read these binders. If you learn anything, forget it, because knowledge isn't rewarded here." "Try giving up hope. It turns the bad feeling into emptiness."

