Stop Meetings Comic Strips - Page 4
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579 Results for Stop Meetings
View 31 - 40 results for stop meetings comic strips. Discover the best "Stop Meetings" comics from Dilbert.com.
Tuesday May 28,
2019
Wally And His Priorities
Tags #business, #meetings, #office, #office workers, #sarcasm
Transcript
the boss: wally, can you attend a meeting at 10 am tomorrow? wally: sure. here's a list of my projects so you can tell me which one you want to fail while i'm wasting my time at your meeting. the boss: was there a chance one of them would succeed? wally: well played
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Monday May 27,
2019
Wally's Reading Time
Tags #business, #meetings, #office, #office workers
Transcript
alice: wally, can we meet tomorrow at 8 am? wally: that's when i eat breakfast in the cafeteria. alice: how about 9 am? wally: that would bump into my bowel and reading time.
Saturday May 25,
2019
And Then Mark Said
Tags #anger, #business, #office, #office workers, #relationships
Transcript
tina: ...and then mark said... dilbert: stop talking about mark! dilbert is visually angry. dilbert: all you do is talk about mark! i am so sick of mark. please talk about anything but mark. dilbert is still visually angry. tina: someone told me you'd say that. dilbert: was his name -- MARK? dilbert angry.
Thursday May 09,
2019
Keyboard Tapping
Tags #boss, #business, #office, #office workers, #sleeping, #multi-task
Transcript
the boss: why do i hear a keyboard tapping every time i'm talking? click, click, click. alice: i have to multi-task when you talk, just to stay awake. the boss: please stop doing that. alice: okay... - zzzzzz-zzzzzz-zzz...
Saturday April 20,
2019
Wally Slurps
Tags #business, #complaint, #office, #office workers, #soup
Transcript
alice visually distressed and yelling: can you please stop slurping that soup? wally: wow. you complain when i clip my toe-nails, when i make lip-smacking sounds, when i use my speaker-phone, and even when i microwave fish. alice still yelling: doesn't that tell you some things?? wally: yes, it's impossible to please you. slurp.
Thursday April 11,
2019
Keyboard Clicks
Tags #business, #cell phone, #office, #office workers
Transcript
alice: i noticed you have your keyboard click sounds activated. i've been listening to it all morning. the boss holding cell phone: i don't know how to make it stop. alice: i'll show you. frame shows outside of office building with phone being thrown out window.
Friday March 01,
2019
Being Like A Man
Tags #advertising, #business, #criticism, #men and women, #relations between the sexes, #sales
Transcript
Boss: Our new advertising campaign is "Don't be like men." The ad starts with a montage of bad male behavior, from mansplaining to genocide. Then we show our product. Alice: Did a woman come up with this campaign? Boss: Stop being like a man.
Saturday February 16,
2019
Dumb Questions
Tags #boss, #insults, #meetings, #office, #office workers, #questions, #sarcasm
Transcript
Dilbert: Let's brainstorm, and remember, there are no dumb questions, only dumb bosses. Boss: Was that necessary? Dilbert: I stand corrected: There is at least one dumb question.
Sunday February 03,
2019
Tags #business, #business ethics, #construction, #inventions, #nature, #technology, #trees
Transcript
Dilbert: I invented a cost-effective product to harvest CO2 from the air and turn it into construction material. Asok: So...you invented a tree? Dilbert: What? Asok: Trees take CO2 from the air and turn it into wood. Your invention will compete with plants and trees for necessary CO2. It seems you have doomed all life on Earth. Dilbert: Not if people act rationally and stop removing the CO2 when...wait... You're right. I doomed the planet. Boss: I'll be dead by then, so ship it.
Wednesday January 30,
2019
Best Product
Tags #criticism, #jokes, #meetings, #office, #office workers, #sarcasm, #presentation
Transcript
Ted: As you can see from this chart, our product has been rated number one for six years in a row. Dilbert: Why does your chart stop four years ago? Ted: I'll bet you don't get invited to a lot of parties. Dilbert: That's just a lucky guess.