Stupid Misperceptions Comic Strips - Page 4
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254 Results for Stupid Misperceptions
View 31 - 40 results for stupid misperceptions comic strips. Discover the best "Stupid Misperceptions" comics from Dilbert.com.
Thursday July 12,
2018
Dilbert Is Misinterpreted
Tags #assume, #assumption, #proof, #obstinacy
Transcript
Alice: Is it true you are telling everyone the new product road map is stupid? Dilbert: Um... nothing remotely like that has ever happened. Here's an email in which I say how good it is. Alice: You hesitated in your answer. That means you're lying. Dilbert: Read the email!!!
Monday June 25,
2018
Feedback From Twitter Guy
Tags #feedback, #criticism, #social media, #twitter, #tweet, #troll, #technology
Transcript
Dilbert: Do you have any feedback on my idea? Man: Yes. You're weak and stupid, and everyone you love will end up in jail. Dilbert: Do you spend a lot of time on Twitter? Man: Is that a lucky guess or are you spying on me?
Thursday June 14,
2018
Dilbert Speaks Truth To Power
Wednesday May 16,
2018
Facial Recognition Software
Tags #facial recognition, #stupid, #insult, #obliviousness, #prototype, #intelligence
Transcript
Dilbert: I'm designing a device that uses facial recognition to detect stupidity. I need your help creating the pattern-recognition algorithm. Boss: What do you need me to do? Dilbert: Look straight ahead and smile.
Wednesday May 09,
2018
Our Api
Tags #hackers, #hacking, #api, #jargon, #obliviousness, #language
Transcript
Narrator: Dogbert The Reporter. Dogbert: How did hackers get access to your customer data? CEO: I'm told they used something called "our A.P.I." to suck out all the data. Dogbert: I'll just say you'er stupid. CEO: Why does everyone always say that?
Friday April 06,
2018
Elbonian Interference
Tags #hacker, #hacking, #trolls, #protest, #counter-protest, #obliviousness, #manipulation
Transcript
Dilbert: Uh-oh. I think we are being attacked by an Elbonian troll farm. They're organizing an employee protest against management and... a management counter-protest against employees. Luckily, no one here is stupid enough to... Boss: Down with employees!
Sunday January 14,
2018
Tags #network, #optics, #stupid company, #Women, #imagination, #flirting, #miscommunication, #co workers, #argument, #women in management, #employees, #business
Transcript
Carol: do you have lunch plans? Dilbert: Aren't you married? Carol: Im not asking you out on a date, Im trying to network. Dilbert: The optics wouldn't be good. Carol: How am I supposed to network in this stupid company? Dilbert: Maybe you could network with other women. Carol: This company has no women in management! Now I see the problem. Its people like you! Dilbert: Is it my imagination or was she flirting with me? Wally: I can't tell.
Tuesday January 02,
2018
Wally Has A Car Problem
Tags #blame, #excuse, #laziness, #problems, #starbucks, #car problem
Transcript
Wally: Sorry I'm late. I had a car problem. Boss: What kind of car problem? Wally: I didn't get in it soon enough. Boss: That sounds like a "you" problem. Wally: Then my stupid car took me to Starbucks.
Friday December 22,
2017
Human Sensation Slipping Away
Tags #addiction, #humanity, #technology, #existentialism, #existential crisis, #awareness
Transcript
Dilbert: My sensation of being human is slipping away. My car practically drives itself, and the apps on my phone control my brain. I feel as if I need to do something stupid just to feel alive. Carol: Homeland security?
Wednesday November 15,
2017
Wally's Watch Is A Snitch
Tags #wearable tech, #health, #surveillance, #fitbit, #monitor, #fitness, #attendance
Transcript
Wally: I can't come to work today. I'm totally sick. Boss: According to your employee health monitor, you're not sick at all. Wally: Stupid snitch!!!