Wages Comic Strips - Page 4

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

55 Results for Wages

View 31 - 40 results for wages comic strips. Discover the best "Wages" comics from Dilbert.com.

Wally Does Ceo Job For 10%

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Wally Does Ceo Job For 10% - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags deception, money, wages, work ethic, annual pay, deal, split work, salary, work percentage, pass the buck

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert the CEO. Dogbert: I will give you 10% of my annual pay if you do 100% of my job for me. 10% of my pay as CEO is still a lot of money. Wally: I'll do it. I'll give you 10% of what he's paying me if you do 100% of his work plus mine. It's still a lot of money. Asok: I'm in!

Hiring A Co Ceo

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Hiring A Co Ceo - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags ceos, executives, wages, work ethic, co ceo, break tie, manioulate, pay, hire, split salary, money

View Transcript

Transcript

CEO: I decided to hire a co-CEO to share the job with me. Dilbert: I assume you know that having a co-CEO does not mean you get paid the same while working half as much. CEO: Can I fire you? Co-CEO: No, we need a third CEO to break the tie.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags choosing, wages, scientific reaserch, happiness, more money, renounce science, el gato diablo, psychology, money

View Transcript

Transcript

Catbert: According to scientific research, your happiness will not increase if you make more money. Therefore, I can only authorize a raise for you if you renounce science. Say it! Say you renounce science! Dilbert: El gato diablo!

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags hypocrisy, managers & supervisors, wages, world records set, best employee, job performance, no raise, drug enhancing drugs, injected against will, leadership, business, money

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: You've set several world records for best employee job performance. But I can't give you a raise because you used job performance enhancing drugs. Dilbert: You injected me against my will. Boss: It would be leadership if you wanted to do it.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags miserliness, wages, good work, saves billons, no raise, personal item, on desk, insoubordination, abuse of power, boss, money

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: Alice, your good work has saved the company over a billion dollars. But I can't give you a raise because you once had a personal item on your desk. Alice: How are those things equal?!! Boss: And here comes the insubordination.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags competition (psychology), wages, big data, top perfromers, higher pay, average performance, average people say, money

View Transcript

Transcript

Catbert: Our big data analysis tells us that only the top performers leave for higher pay. Since you're still here, it means your performance is average at best. Dilbert: That's not fair! Catbert: That's what all the average people say.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags executives, rich people, wages, ceo lifestyle, yacht, penthouse, estate, priceless art, million dollar watch, money

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: Hey, look! There's a story on the Internet about your fabulous CEO lifestyle. Here's a picture of your yacht, your penthouse in New York, your palatial estate, and your priceless art. CEO: This really isn't the time. Dilbert: Said the man with the million-dollar watch.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags victims, wages, lazy, undependable, disruptive, raise, blamed victime, money

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: You're lazy, undependable, and disruptive. That's why I can't give you a raise this year. Dilbert: How'd it go? Wally: He blamed the victim.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags wages, 2% raise, lower quality of work, side bets, money

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: The best I can give you is a 2% raise. Dilbert: No problem. I'll just lower the quality of my work until my pay feels fair. Boss: You can't do that. Dilbert: I'm taking side bets that I can.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags executives, wages, media, overpaid, ceos, executive pay, sultan of brunei, larry elliosn, god, Religion, Entertainment, money

View Transcript

Transcript

CEO: The media is saying I'm overpaid compared to other CEOs. That's crazy. Do a benchmark study of executive pay, including the Sultan of Brunei, Larry Ellison, and God. Make sure my pay ends up somewhere in the middle so it doesn't look suspicious.