Without Using Comic Strips - Page 4

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

476 Results for Without Using

View 31 - 40 results for without using comic strips. Discover the best "Without Using" comics from Dilbert.com.

Winning The Nasa Contract

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Winning The Nasa Contract - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #aliens, #attack, #communication, #earth, #space, #nasa

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: NASA has detected an alien probe heading for earth. We won the NASA contract to contact the aliens using a focused laser beam. Dilbert: Wouldn't that look to them like an attack? Boss: Maybe that's why do one else bid.

No Internet

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
No Internet - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business, #complaining, #engineering, #office workers, #technology

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: The network will be down all day, but try to do what you can without it. Dilbert: What can we do without it besides drink coffee, complain, and whittle? Boss: No knives at work. Dilbert: Hold off on the whittling.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #the boss, #customer, #meeting, #engineers, #years, #disasters, #worry, #data, #centers, #blockchain

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: Can I go with you to the customer meeting? I'm worried you might promise something we can't deliver. The Boss: Don't be ridiculous! I've been having customer meetings without engineers for years. Dilbert: I know and they all turn into disasters. The Boss: You worry too much! Everything will be fine! Man: Can you replace our data centers with blockchain? The Boss: Give us two days.

Catbert Personality Test

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Catbert Personality Test - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Catbert, #applicants, #personality, #test, #reliable, #Astrology, #reliability

View Transcript

Transcript

Catbert: All job applicants must take the Catbert personality test to see how well they will fit into our culture. Studies show the test is twice as reliable as using astrology alone. Man: Astrology has zero reliability. Catbert: You're not a good fit.

Dogbert's Pep Talk

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Dogbert's Pep Talk - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #Dogbert, #virtual, #forget, #real, #people, #inadequate, #talk

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: I'm worried that if I spend too much time using virtual reality, I'll forget how to talk to real people. Dogbert: I doubt you could get more boring and inadequate than you already are.

Present Company Excluded

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Present Company Excluded - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #carol, #virtual, #human, #organic, #cheated, #present, #excluded, #problem

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: I just spent three days using virtual reality with no human contact whatsoever. Now every time I interact with an organic human, I feel cheated. Carol: Present company excluded? Dilbert: Here's another problem I never have in virtual reality.

Candor Monster

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Candor Monster - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #the boss, #carol, #radical candor, #therapy, #criticism, #monster

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss: My new system of using "radical candor," is working out great. I've been criticizing people all morning and only three of them went into therapy over it. Now I turn my candor to you. Carol: Die, monster!

Dilbert Uses Bumper Sticker Wisdom

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Dilbert Uses Bumper Sticker Wisdom - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #the boss, #permission, #bumper stickers, #forgive

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss: Dilbert, did you reconfigure the server without my permission? Dilbert: Let me consult my collection of bumper stickers for an answer. "It is easier to ask forgiveness than permission." The Boss: Okay, that sounds right.

Ai For Productivity

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Ai For Productivity - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #meetings, #meeting, #productivity, #obliviousness, #business

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: We started using A.I. to identify when employees are unproductive. Device: Ping ping ping ping ping ping. Boss: Looks like this meeting is setting off some alarms.

Wally's Stealth Drone

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Wally's Stealth Drone - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #deception, #deceit, #drone, #technology, #invention, #fake

View Transcript

Transcript

Wally: In my right hand is a standard drone. In my left hand is a drone using the cloaking technology I invented. Voices: Ooh! Wow! Wally: I'll demonstrate it flying as soon as I finish the noise cancellation. CEO: Employee of the year!