Animal Testing Comic Strips - Page 4
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122 Results for Animal Testing
View 31 - 40 results for animal testing comic strips. Discover the best "Animal Testing" comics from Dilbert.com.
Saturday April 17,
2010
Tags #meeting, #presentation, #fall asleep, #dream, #animal snout, #nose job, #reality, #tease, #mouth open, #scared, #wiggle fingers, #annoyed, #business
Transcript
Asok says, "I must have fallen asleep during your presentation. I dreamed I had an animal snout for a nose. It seemed so real." Dilbert says, "If you can't tell your dreams from your reality, maybe this is your dream and you really do have a snout." Dilbert says, "Does anything seem strange or out of place in this reality?" Wally says, "Can we please do some work?"
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marketing, project, cloud, catbert, leadership, budget, birthday, engineer, time sheet, sales, wally, strategy, dogbert, powerpoint, project management, topper, leader, boss, change, meeting, data, management, mordac
Saturday August 21,
2010
Wednesday July 01,
2009
Tags #presentation, #testing, #recommendation, #pain, #angry, #screaming, #ridicule
Transcript
Dilbert says, "The results of out beta testing are in." Dilbert says, "Our user interface triggered wide-spread despondency and self-mutilation." Dilbert says, "Obviously we'll need to delay our launch for the public good." The boss says, "When did you become a communist?"
Sunday July 06,
2003
Tags #testing new invention, #mothers use telephone, #toddlers noise cancelation, #visual, #child, #moth frozen open, #change forever
Transcript
Dilbert says into the telephone, "Thanks for testing my new invention." The woman on the other end of the line says, "If this thing works, it will forever change the way that mothers use the telephone." Dilbert says, "We've been on the phone for half a minute. The noise should start at any moment." The woman says, "Here it comes." A toddler walks into the room and yells, "Hey! What are you doing on the phone?!" The toddler continues yelling, "Can I eat ten cookies? I think my arm is broken! Where's my toy?!!" The toddler cries, "Waaaaaaaaa!!" On the other end of the line, Dilbert says, "Now push the toddler noise cancellation button." The toddler's mouth is still wide open, but no sound is coming out. The woman says, "It stopped the noise, but you need to do something about the visual."
Sunday August 06,
2000
Tags #video cameras installed, #id badges, #internet, #phone use monitored, #drug testing, #hot irons, #brand awareness, #branding, #employees, #business, #technology
Transcript
Catbert the Evil HR Director says to the staff, "Video cameras have been installed in all work areas." Catbert holds up a badge and says, "Employees must wear I.D. badges around their neck." Catbert continues, "Your internet and telephone usage will be monitored." Catbert continues, "Everyone will undergo mandatory drug testing." Catbert thinks to himself, "They're not resisting. They're ready for phase two." Catbert says, "Prepare to be permanently marked by hot ironos." The Boss asks Catbert, "Will that hurt?" Catbert answers, "I'll be fine. Thanks for asking." Everyone holds Wally down on the table as Catbert announces, "Wally is about to experience brand awareness."
Monday May 27,
2013
Tags #animal costumes, #big game hunting, #costumes, #furry lifestyle, #go on safari, #take a trip, #like animals
Transcript
Boss: Carol, why did you send me a link about people who like to dress in animal costumes? Carol: It's called the Furry Lifestyle. I thought you might want to try it out. Boss: I'll take a look. Dilbert: What's your end game? Carol: If the Furry thing sticks I'll try to get him to go on a safari.
Friday August 16,
2013
Tags #cruelty, #grades, #managers & supervisors, #small animal snuff film, #sociopath module, #punch a squirrel, #extra credit, #coffee pot, #business
Transcript
Dilbert: I heard you got booted off the management fast track. Wally: Yeah. I fell asleep during the small animal snuff film and failed the sociopath module. Dilbert: That seems harsh. Wally: I offered to punch a squirrel, but they don't allow extra credit.
Thursday March 13,
2014
Tags #competition (psychology), #pride, #a-b testing, #traffic to site, #most effective search terms, #wingless skunk, #junkyard sbnack, #planned injury, #topper
Transcript
Coworker: I did A-B testing and found the search terms that bring the most people to our site. The most effective search terms are "wingless skunk," "junkyard snack," and "planned injury." Topper: Well, duh! You could have just asked me. Topper
Saturday March 15,
2014
Tags #internet & world wide web, #power (social sciences), #slaves, #a-b testing, #manipulate humans, #orange button, #mindless puppets, #legality
Transcript
Dogbert: Buwhahaha! I'm using A-B testing to manipulate irrational humans! Bend to my will and choose the orange button, you mindless click-puppets! Dilbert: And this is legal? Dogbert: I own you now!
Monday October 27,
2014
Tags #advertising, #deception, #graphic design, #graphic designers, #marketing, #a_b testing, #design options, #skill set, #random behavior, #talent, #secrets, #business
Transcript
Graphic Designer. Dilbert: I'll do some A-B testing with the design options you provided. Interestingly, the fact that you can't predict which design will perform best means your skill set is mostly random behavior that you package as talent. Designer: This works better if i'm the only one who knows that.