Burial Site Comic Strips - Page 4

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43 Results for Burial Site

View 31 - 40 results for burial site comic strips. Discover the best "Burial Site" comics from Dilbert.com.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 03, 2008's comic on:


Tags #traffic, #work, #co worker, #shopping, #week, #attractive nuisance

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secretary: Wally, did you finish the traffic estimates?" Wally: I didn't have time. I spent all week shopping on the company's online supply ordering site. Hey, you can't blame the guy who just uses the attractive nuisance.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share February 01, 2009's comic on:


Tags #etiquette & ethics, #lying

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The boss says, "Asok, we're getting killed by bad customer reviews online." The boss says, "I need you to pretend you're several different customers and write positive reviews." Asok says, "Doesn't that break some sort of law?" The boss says, "Heck no. it only crosses some ethical boundaries and violates the term of service for the web site." The boss says, "And depending on your religious views, it might be a hiccup on your way to paradise." The boss says, "But I'm almost certain there won't be any jail time or eternal damnation." Asok says, "Well...okay." The boss says, "And be sure to defame our competitors."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 21, 2009's comic on:


Tags #vacation, #delegating, #excuses, #volunteering, #cruel, #mean

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The boss says, "Alice, you'll be acting manager next week while I'm on vacation." Alice says, "I can't. I'll be in a training class all week." The boss says, "Dilbert, you'll?" Dilbert says, "I'll be at a customer site all week." The boss says, "Carol..." Carol says, "I'll be getting my tubes tied." The Boss says, "Asok..." Asok says, "I'm going to my grandmother's funeral in India." Wally says, "Yes? Is there something you need me to do?" The Boss says, "Attend a funeral in India. Tell everyone you're Asok and you had a horrible accident." The boss says, "Tell them the acid destroyed your hair and your personality." Wally says, "That took an ugly turn."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 21, 2007's comic on:


Tags #albanian airlines, #bad airlines, #baggage, #cheapest flights, #corporate travel website, #Food, #security, #travel must be booked, #osama bin laden

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The Boss: From now on, all travel must be booked through the corporate travel web site. Alice: Our travel web site is terrible. It only lets you book the cheapest flight, and that's always on Elbonian Airlines. The Boss: Don't be such a snob. What's wrong with using a discount airline? Alice: Well, they list their destination airports as 'whatever looks soft'. The meals in first class are made of anyone who dies in coach. Their entire security screening process involves shouting at each passenger 'Are you Osama bin Laden?!!!'" "And I once saw a baggage handler wearing my dress. The Boss: Whiner.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 15, 2007's comic on:


Tags #flash, #java script, #website, #fast guy in tights, #movie about coffee, #code words, #remember, #technology

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The Boss: Then we program the web site using a fast guy in tights and a movie about coffee. "Correct me if I'm wrong." Dilbert: "We use flash and java script." "I said 'IF'!!!"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 24, 2005's comic on:


Tags #emailed file, #accomplishments, #entire month, #open the file, #down load, #browser, #upgrade broswer, #operating system, #upagrde, #software, #hard disk, #view of file, #engineering

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"My accomplishement this month was opening a file that someone e-mailed." "That took an entire month?" "It wasn't that easy. I didn't have the right software to open the file." "I tried to download the viewer from the Internet but the Web site didn't support my browser." "And I couldn't upgrade my browser until I updated my operating system!" "That required me to upgrade all of my software, too." "My hard disk got maxed out, so I had to upgrade my computer and transfer all of the files." "So, then you got to view the file?" "Yeah...It was a funny one about a cat."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 14, 2013's comic on:


Tags #access, #apprval, #blocked website, #cip, #director of hr, #hostiliy, #mean, #threat

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This website has been blocked by your company. Dilbert: Mordac, I need access to a blocked site for business reasons, Mordac: I can only unblock the site if the director of human resources sends me a written approval. Catbert: I can only make recommendations, Our Cis still has to approve it. Chief Information Officer How dare you bother me with your trivial website problem! Carol back into your hole and think about the career mistake you just made! Dilbert: Can we kip the part where you ask me what I accomplished this week?

Dilbert Does Online Dating

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Dilbert Does Online Dating - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 31, 2014's comic on:


Tags #dating, #internet dating, #low standards, #online dating, #triple threat, #six feet tall, #hair, #height, #job, #business, #relationships

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Dilbert: I got 9,752 responses on this dating site and I haven't even completed my profile. All I said is that I'm six feet tall, I have hair and a job. Meanwhile, everywhere: Women: Hair... height... job! Triple threat!

Stress As A Wellness Issue

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Stress As A Wellness Issue - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 22, 2015's comic on:


Tags #loophole, #medicine, #health, #stress, #work, #medical leave, #work ethic, #laziness

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Boss: We have a problem. Our employee wellness site lists stress as a medical problem. And working here causes stress. Catbert: How many of them took paid medical leave? Boss: It's just you now. I'm packed.

Requesting The Slightest Change

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Requesting The Slightest Change - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 18, 2016's comic on:


Tags #web, #internet, #site, #code, #coding, #development, #deadline, #delay, #time, #technology

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Boss: Will our new website be live this week? Developer: That depends. If you request even the slightest change, it could set things back for months. Boss: I only want to change the homepage title font. Developer: Oh, great. I should be done by next summer.