Coffee Machine Comic Strips - Page 4

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438 Results for Coffee Machine

View 31 - 40 results for coffee machine comic strips. Discover the best "Coffee Machine" comics from Dilbert.com.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags computers & peripherals, inventions, computers, program themsleves, machine intelligence, destroy civilization, plan a, live unhealthy, lifestyle, plan b, techno terrorism

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Dilbert: In a few years, computers will program themselves. That's called singularity. From that point on, machine intelligence will increase exponentially. The resulting shock will probably destroy the fabric of civilization. Plan "A" is to live an unhealthy lifestyle. Plan "B" is techno-terrorism. Boss: I like the first one.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags automobile travel, automobiles (cars), weather, zero degrees, icy roads, coffee, traffic, guradrail, 3 hours late

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Boss: You're just now getting here? Wally: It's zero degrees and the roads are all ice. I drank six cups of coffee before leaving the house and sat in traffic for two hours. Boss: You're three hours late. Wally: I spent the last hour stuck to a guardrail.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags fast forward, phone, playing, time machine, time travel

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Dilbert: My phone is like a time machine. I can fast-forward through the boring parts of life by playing with it. Dogbert: Hand it over. Time flies when I'm not having fun.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags service animal, monkey, coffee cup, dignified, coffee warm, animals

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Carl: Thought being a service animal would be a noble calling. But I worry that our relationship has drifted into something less dignified. wally: Thats what keeps my coffee warm. CarL: I am so angry right now.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags coffee, economic policy, Opinion

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Dilbert and Dogbert sit at the table. Dilbert reads the newspaper and asks, "What do you think about this new Soviet policy of openness?" Dogbert replies, "Actually, I'm not even sure that Gorbachev exists." Dogbert continues, "Guess I'm just kinda 'glasnostic.'" Dilbert says, "I shouldn't let you drink coffee."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags Dilbert, newspaper, thief, machine, money, eating

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Dilbert puts a coin in a newspaper machine and thinks, "Sometimes I get this wicked urge to take two newspapers and only pay for one." Dilbert looks behind him and thinks, "What's the worst that can happen? Besides, this machine ate my money last time." Dilbert looks at a newspaper. On the front page is a picture of him stealing the newspaper and the headline says, "Thief!"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags Dilbert, Dogbert, date, home, coffee, brainella, queen, bee, light, bulbs

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Dogbert sits on the hassock reading a book. Dilbert says, "Pssst! Dogbert." Dilbert says, "I brought my date home for some coffee. Please don't make any comments about her . . . Uh . . . Looks." Dilbert brings his date in and says, "Brainella, this is Dogbert." Dogbert sees her large head and asks, "The Queen Bee of light bulbs?"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags Dogbert, garbage, cataloupe, rinds, newspaper, sprinkled, coffee, grounds, blue collar, work, romantic

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Dogbert asks the garbage man, "Mister Garbage Man, what is life?" The garbage man replies, "Well, Dogbert . . ." The garbage man continues, "Life is like old cantaloupe rinds wrapped in a faded newspaper and sprinkled with wet coffee grounds." Dogbert asks, "Life is garbage?" The garbage man replies, "Call me a romantic."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags all, coffee, consumerism, Dilbert, killed, michael, microchip

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Dilbert gets sucked into his computer. Dilbert: You.. You're a microchip... Michael: I am. C'mon in and have some coffee. Dilbert: Chips drink coffee? Michael: Gallons. It keeps us fast. Dilbert: Doesn't that make you irritable with the other microchips? Michael: Not since I killed them all.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags garbage man, die, cloning, machine, design, math, errors, Dogbert, Dilbert

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The garbage man asks Dogbert, "Not much garbage . . . Did somebody die?" Dogbert replies, "Dilbert went to the compost pile in the sky." The garbage man reads a piece of paper and says, "Bad timing . . . Judging from last week's garbage, he had almost finished his cloning machine design. I only notice a few linear math errors." The garbage man continues, "This design would just create a hologram and a bad chile con carne recipe." Dogbert says, "Man, you sure know your garbage!"