Common Comic Strips - Page 4

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58 Results for Common

View 31 - 40 results for common comic strips. Discover the best "Common" comics from Dilbert.com.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 30, 1989's comic on:


Tags #Dilbert, #Dogbert, #straight, #bad, #grammar, #intellectuals

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Dogbert asks Dilbert, "Let me get this straight . . . You say that BAD grammar can become GOOD grammar over time?" Dilbert replies, "Yes. If a bunch of intellectuals start using a word wrong, then it becomes proper in common usage." Dogbert says, "Grammar would be a lot less confusing if we had smarter intellectuals."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 25, 1992's comic on:


Tags #Dogbert, #common sense, #school, #water, #boot, #heel, #betty, #liquid, #hair, #partial, #credit

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Dogbert asks, "Who can show me how to get the water out of this boot?" Dogbert hands the boot to a woman and says, "If you have trouble, the directions are written on the heel." As the woman puts her head into the boot, Dogbert says, "I'm sorry, Betty. I can only give you partial credit for trying to absorb the liquid with your hair."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 26, 1992's comic on:


Tags #Dogbert, #common sense, #school, #todd, #scissors, #russell, #dont, #run, #aaagh, #left handed, #teacher, #hand

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Dogbert hands a man a pair of scissors and says, "Todd, show the class how you hand these scissors to Russell." Dogbert yells, "Don't run! Don't run!" Russell screams. Todd looks down at Russell, who is lying on the floor, and says, "Sorry, Russell. It's the teacher's fault; he didn't even ask if I need left-handed scissors."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 27, 1992's comic on:


Tags #Dogbert, #school, #common, #sense, #story, #clayton, #auto, #mechanic, #cigars, #gasoline, #engine, #lightning, #guess

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Dogbert stands in a dark classroom holding a pointer and using an overhead projector. Dogbert says, "This is the story of Clayton the Auto Mechanic." Dogbert continues, "Clayton smoked cigars while working on gasoline engines. What problem did this cause?" The projector shows an explosion. A man wrapped in bandages says, "He was hit by lightning every time?" Dogbert asks, "Does anybody beside Clayton have a guess?"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 07, 1993's comic on:


Tags #Dilbert, #Dogbert, #alice, #volunteering, #resume

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Dogbert says to Dilbert, Wally and Alice, "Thank you all for volunteering for my task force on 'palmtop personal multimedia.'" Dogbert continues, "I'm sure that you all have a common vision about this project . . ." Dogbert continues, "Specifically, you think it will look good on your resumes while being too futuristic to generate any real work." Wally thinks, "Mother lode."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 12, 1994's comic on:


Tags #key boards replaced, #motion sensing, #computer screen, #3d image, #technical professionals, #engineer, #moron, #engineering

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"Dogbert the Futurist" Dogbert: "Someday, keyboards will be replaced by motion-sensing rings on your fingers..." "The computer screen will be projected into your glasses as a 3-D image." - These developments will not enhance the image of technical professionals." Dilbert: "Are you an engineer?" Moron: "I'm a moron. Common mistake."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 11, 1996's comic on:


Tags #over internet, #credit card number, #insecure

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Dilbert and Liz sit at a table in a restaurant. Dilbert says, "I would never buy something over the internet. I'd hate to have my credit card number floating around out there." Dilbert hands his credit card to the waitress as he says, "There are a lot of unscrupulous people on the net." The caption says, "Later." Dilbert concludes, ". . . Bottom line, it just isn't common sense." The waitress returns wearing a fur coat and hands Dilbert's credit card back to him.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share September 16, 1996's comic on:


Tags #pager vibrate, #not wearing, #classic case, #phantom pager, #technology workers, #relocate it

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Dilbert lies on a couch in a therapist's office. Dilbert says, "On weekends I'll feel my pager vibrate . . . But when I go to check it, I realize I'm not wearing it." The psychologist replies, "It's a classic case of phantom-pager syndrome. It's common among technology workers." The psychiatrist adds, "There's no treatment for it." Dilbert says, "I don't want to treat it. I want to relocate it."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 27, 1998's comic on:


Tags #deputy of common sense, #four hour meeting, #behind schedule, #agenda, #morale is low

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During a staff meeting, Dogbert stands on the table holding his gun and says, "FREEZE!!" Dogbert is dressed as a policeman and says, "You scheduled a four-hour meeting to find out why people are behind schedule!" The guy says, "No, look at the agenda! The fourth hour is about why morale is so low. A woman next to him whispers to Dogbert, Shoot him."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 28, 1998's comic on:


Tags #deputy of common sense, #motivate emplyees, #insulting gifts, #symbolism, #chess pieces, #same team, #pawns, #saving rooks

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Dogbert is dressed as a policeman and stands on The Boss's desk and says, "You are accused of trying to motivate employees with insulting gifts." The Boss says, "You're missing the symbolism. I gave them chess pieces to show them we're all on the same team." Dogbert hass a hand on his gun and syas, "Specifically, you gave them pawns." The Boss says, "I'm saving the rooks for bonus day."