Company's Comic Strips - Page 4

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58 Results for Company's

View 31 - 40 results for company's comic strips. Discover the best "Company's" comics from Dilbert.com.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 07, 2003's comic on:


Tags #Dogbert, #headhunter, #stock up, #ceo, #random upturns, #make millions, #changing jobs, #legal, #victims

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Dogbert sits at a desk. He says into the phone, "This is Dogbert the Headhunter. I noticed that your company's stock is up today." Dogbert continues, "As CEO, you can take credit for random upturns and make millions by changing jobs." Dogbert continues, "Ha, ha! Yes, it's legal. In fact, if you write a book, your victims will buy it!"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 31, 2004's comic on:


Tags #tech support, #another company, #determine cause

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"This is Dogbert's tech support. Your problem is caused by another company's product or services." "Shouldnt I tell you my problem before you determine the cause?" "Okay, let's pretend that will change my answer."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share September 06, 2004's comic on:


Tags #bridery, #boss, #bribery dvd, #prepping, #money, #offer, #sly, #meeting, #drinks, #top secret, #business

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"If you recommend my company's product to your board, there might be a little something for you later." "Before you decide, look at this DVD titled, 'Is bribery right for you?'" "The narrator might refer to you by name when she dances."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 14, 2005's comic on:


Tags #brand, #company name, #finding a team, #reputation, #new stadium

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Our marketing plan was to find a sports stadium to brand with our company's name. "The hard part was finding a team so jiuced up that our reputation seemed good in comparison." "How do you feel about the new stadium name?" "Rage. Same as always."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 20, 2005's comic on:


Tags #doctors offcie, #exam room, #toxikill, #drug comapny, #totally hot, #side effects, #what eaten, #doctor, #thinking of date, #drug rep, #hot, #payoff, #kick back, #medical

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Doctor: You're healthy but I have to give you a prescription for tocikill. The drug company's rep is totally hot and said she'd take me to lunch if I sell enough of this stuff." Dilbert: Will there be any side effects?" " Doctor: Depends on what I eat."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share September 09, 2005's comic on:


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Having two computers is a violation of the company's 5S rules of standardized workspace. "I need two computers to test my software. There's no way to do my job with one." "I have a compromise solution. Put this little red tag on one of them and tell me later if anything bad happens."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 31, 2005's comic on:


Tags #overall startegy, #never ask questiom, #hear the answer

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How does my project fit into our company's overall strategy? "Beats me. I didn't even know we had a strategy." "Never ask a question if you don't want to hear the answer." "That's why I never say 'How are you?'"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 17, 2007's comic on:


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I can monitor the company's key metrics from my executive dashboard. "Uh-oh. I need to do a better job of falsifying my data." "Allow me to set the stage for your next assignment by reminding you that stockholders have never done anything for you."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 28, 2007's comic on:


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"I represent the law firm of Dogbert, Dogbert, and more Dogbert." "Your company's web page steals people's cursors and puts them in your own search field." "And my suit is too tight. When you put it all together, I might have to kill you."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 02, 2007's comic on:


Tags #strategic asset, #market share, #fire yourself, #accountabilty

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The Boss: Human resources is a company's most important strategic asset. "That means it's your fault we're losing market share. Maybe you should fire yourself." "Strategic assets don't like accountability."