Great Honor Comic Strips - Page 4
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398 Results for Great Honor
View 31 - 40 results for great honor comic strips. Discover the best "Great Honor" comics from Dilbert.com.
Thursday December 07,
2000
Tags #excused, #god judge you, #honor, #judge, #jury selction, #legal
Transcript
Jury Selection Man In turban: Your honor, It is against my religion to judge others only god may judge Judge: You're excised. Juror: OOH OHH! I just changed my religion! Man In turban: Jerk
Monday December 31,
2001
Tags #morale boosting, #great idea, #first meeting
Transcript
The Boss says to Carol, "Carol, I want you to help me put together a morale boosting event." Carol responds, "Great idea. And after that maybe I can do CPR on a mummy and see if I can save its life." The Boss responds, "Our first meeting will be Tuesday." Carol exclaims, "Do you hear what I'm saying?"
Saturday January 19,
2002
Tags #sales training, #sell to customer, #dare to be great, #prove worthiness, #beg
Transcript
Headline: Sales Training. The speaker says, "Never sell to your customer. Make your customer sell to you." The speaker continues, "Our products are only for those who dare to be great! Make the customer explain why he is worthy." Dilbert is meeting with a customer. Dilbert says, "You heard me, Goober. Now beg for our product."
Friday May 30,
2003
Tags #new product brochures, #design awards, #great, #award winning designer, #can't stop complaining
Transcript
In a meeting, a co-worker hands Dilbert a brochure and exclaims, "The new product brochures have already won design awards!" Dilbert responds, "That's great, but our product won't do any of the things you claim here." The co-worker crosses his arm and says, "Well, who should we believe - the award-winning designer or the guy who can't stop complaining?"
Tuesday July 01,
2003
Tags #great leader, #read books, #inspired leaders for centuries, #first pyramids, #12 year old pharoah, #look naughty
Transcript
Dogbert is standing next to a stack of books on The Boss' desk. He says, "If you want to be a great leader, read the books that have inspired leaders for centuries." Dogbert holds up a book and says, "For example, the first pyramids were built after a twelve-year-old pharaoh read this book." The Boss reads the title, "Things That Look Naughty From Miles Away."
Friday July 18,
2003
Tags #corporate witch hunt, #products stink, #diving rod, #liar, #pormise, #honor of family, #holy
Transcript
Headline: Corporate Witch-Hunt. The Boss asks Alice, "Alice, did you tell a reporter that our producs stink?" Alice responds, "I promise on the honor of my family, and on all that is holy, that I did not." Alice is sitting at her computer. The Boss approaches from behind with a device in his hands. He says, "So I guess you're calling my divining rod a liar."
Friday November 07,
2003
Tags #lazy rich, #new product, #rebate, #1 million, #banking on forgetting, #great bargain, #one person
Transcript
Dogbert: "Don't sell your new product for $29. Offer it at $1,000,029 with a rebate of $1,000,000." "People will think it's a great bargain when in fact it's just a huge inconvenience." The Boss: "And all we need is one person to forget to mail in the rebate forms." Dogbert: "We'll target the lazy rich."
Thursday June 24,
2004
Tags #resume, #stole stuff, #great stuff, #caught in parking lot, #technically not stealing, #buried german tourust, #guilty, #crazy, #admits to bizarreness
Transcript
The Boss: "According to your resume, you left your last job because you allegedly stole lots of great stuff." "Technically, if they catch you in the parking lot, and you give it back, that's not stealin'." "And you buried a German tourist in your cellar." "One time!"
Tuesday July 27,
2004
Tags #lunch, #great opportunity, #multi level marketing, #bible, #diet plan
Transcript
"Hey, Dilbert! How would you like to go to lunch?" "Alone." "Alone! Ha ha! but then you'd miss out on this great opportunity!" "It's multi-level marketing plus a diet plan suggested by the bible!" "Shoot me."
Monday July 23,
2012
Tags #secretaries (office), #increase work productivity, #yammering, #salted earth, #great plan
Transcript
Boss: I just thought of a great idea for increasing workplace productivity. Carol: Does it involve standing near my workplace and yammering while I try to work? Boss: Geez. Who salted the Earth? Carol: Your plan is going great so far.