Interest Comic Strips - Page 4

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51 Results for Interest

View 31 - 40 results for interest comic strips. Discover the best "Interest" comics from Dilbert.com.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 08, 2001's comic on:


Tags #be a threat, #Dogbert, #recruitment agency, #clueless people, #bad hair, #cadaver program

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Dogbert stands on The Boss' desk. Dogbert says, "You need to hire people who won't be a threat to you." Dogbert hands The Boss a pamphlet and says, "The Dogbert Recruiting Agency specializes in the placement of clueless people with bad hair." The Boss replies, "I don't know... They still look threatening." Dogbert says, "Perhaps I can interest you in our cadaver program."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 07, 2004's comic on:


Tags #elbonian call center, #software in stock, #wear pants, #porcelain unicorn

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Elbonian Call Center "We don't have that software in stock." "But may I interest you in a set of porcelain unicorn figurines that wear pants?" "Really? Wow. Your country has way too much money."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 16, 2004's comic on:


Tags #ebitda, #acronyms, #made up

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"Hey, Dilbert, what are you doing for the Ebitda today?" "The what?" "Ebitda means the earnings before interest, taxes, depreciation, and um... Ammonia." "Are you sure about ammonia?" "Why must you be so accretive?"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 16, 2000's comic on:


Tags #sales call, #long distance, #how long?, #50 miles long, #don't know anyone

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The Boss' phone rings and he thinks to himself, "Again? That thing rang last week, too." A telephone company representative calls the Boss. "Hello. May I interest you in long distance phone service?" The Boss replies, "How long is it?" The telephone representative answers, "Umm...it's very long. Extremely long." The Boss replies in a demanding manner with one arm thrust in the air, "I need to know exactly how long it is!" The Boss continues to say, "If it's too short I'll have to shout the last mile! I hate that." The telephone respresentative replies, "Okay...it's fifty miles long." The Boss responds, "No, thanks. I don't know anyone fifty miles away."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 22, 2012's comic on:


Tags #computer software, #new software product, #google, #created product, #free, #buy in

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Boss: And we're going to bet the company on our new software product. Dilbert: While you were talking, Google created that product, gave it away for free, and killed it for lack of interest. Wally: Is it too soon to take back my fake buy-in?

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 21, 2012's comic on:


Tags #diseases, #employees, #frustration, #new bad apple, #joining project, #full disclosure, #totally contagious, #immune, #worms, #business, #medical

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Coworker: I'm the new bad apple. I'll be joining your project. In the interest of full disclosure, this is totally contagious. Wally: I'm immune, but not for reasons I'm proud of. Coworker: You must be Wally.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 23, 2010's comic on:


Tags #death ray, #invention, #brain scan, #popcorn, #microwave, #worry, #eyebrows, #north korea

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CEO CEO says, "We're getting a lot of interest in your death ray invention." Dilbert says, "It's not a death ray. It's a portable brain scanner with a popcorn microwave option?" Dilbert says, "Uh-oh. That's a death ray." CEO says, "We have an RFQ from North Korea."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 21, 2009's comic on:


Tags #new employee, #spreadsheet, #yelling, #pain, #bored, #ridiculous

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The MBA guy Man says, "I put together a spreadsheet that might interest you." The boss says, "Ow! Ow! It's so boring, it hurts my head!" The boss says, "My brain is trying to escape through my ear!" Man says, "I get this a lot."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 17, 2009's comic on:


Tags #stealing, #stupidity, #confronting, #ridiculous, #pirate

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Man says, "It's a conflict of interest for you to be our CEO and also a pirate who kidnaps our employees." Dogbert says, "The executive compensation committee approved this arrangement. It's all spelled out in my employment agreement." Man says, "So it is." Dogbert says, "Wait here while I call myself and ransom you back to the office."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 24, 2008's comic on:


Tags #seminar, #teach, #make millions, #scam, #seminar name, #crush hopes, #dreams, #bitter and broken, #nominal fee, #invest, #100 to one million

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Asok says, "I'm going to a seminar that will teach me how to make a million dollars!" Alice says, "It's a scam." Asok says, "How could you know that?" Asok says, "I haven't even told you the name of the seminar!" Asok says, "You can't be sure it is a scam if you know none of the details." Asok says, "You just want to crush my hopes so I become like you." Asok says, "But it won't work because I have dreams! I won't be a bitter and broken cynic like you two!" Asok says, "I'll have the last laugh after I pay my nominal fee and learn how to 'Turn a Hundred Dollars Into a Million.'" Dogbert says, "invest $100 at 5% interest and wait 190 years. Thanks for coming."