Management Cloak Comic Strips - Page 4
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331 Results for Management Cloak
View 31 - 40 results for management cloak comic strips. Discover the best "Management Cloak" comics from Dilbert.com.
Monday October 11,
1993
Tags #business meeting, #Promotion, #Dogbert, #executive man, #management
Transcript
Dogbert and several executives sit at a conference table. Dogbert says, "Thank you all for coming to this emergency board meeting." Dogbert continues, "As you know, all promotions to senior management are based on hair. I think we all agree this is the best system." Dogbert lifts the president's toupee with a pointer and continues, "But have you noticed that I have a rich lustrous coat, whereas our current president gets a little outside help?"
Tuesday January 04,
1994
Tags #organization chart, #management, #bottom, #most important employees, #payed least, #upside down chart
Transcript
The Boss: We've redesigned the organization chart to show management at the BOTTOM supporting our most important employees! Dilbert: Question: why do the most important employees get payed the least? The Boss; Because they would never think of ideas like this upside- down chart concept.
Tuesday March 15,
1994
Tags #new management layer, #middle mangemnet, #new boss, #harfurd, #idiot, #unqualified, #fool
Transcript
The Boss: Im creating a new layer of management so I dont have to talk to you anymore. Richard is your new boss. He has an MBA from Harfund University. Dilbert: You mean Harvard don't you? The Boss: Uh oh
Monday April 04,
1994
Tags #quality training, #promoted, #management, #lobotomy, #footsteps
Transcript
Dilbert: "The only way to get ahead in this company is by getting promoted to management." "I'm willing to do whatever it takes to get promoted. I want to follow in your footsteps." "But I'm wondering if a lobotomy is actually necessary." "No, we'll just run you through 'quality training'."
Monday August 15,
1994
Tags #management fast tracker, #deliver big report, #ceo, #fax, #shredder, #tricked, #punked, #contempt
Transcript
"Hey, Matt. How's our favorite management fast-tracker?" "Great! I've got two minutes to deliver my big report to our CEO. Can you tell me where the fax is?" "Oops, I'm wrong. That's the shredder." "He'll go far in this company." "Bzzzzp."
Saturday September 24,
1994
Tags #confidential questionnaire, #management class, #style of management, #instructor sees, #trusts me, #sneaked a look, #at answers, #ratings
Transcript
"I filled out the confidential questionnaire about your style of management." "I hope it's useful for that management class you're taking. Only your instructor sees those, right?" "Right." "I think I played that about right." "Ooh, good marks! And it says he trusts me too!"
Wednesday September 28,
1994
Tags #Cartoon, #cartoon on back, #hurts morale, #joke, #management decions, #take it down, #improvement
Transcript
The Boss: This cartoon seems to be saying that management decisions are a joke. Cartoons are not allowed on cubicles. It hurst morale, I don't want to see this when I return. The Boss: Ive noticed a real improvement in morale since you removed the cartoon.
Friday November 11,
1994
Tags #buy put options, #engineers order, #management approval, #stock, #dogcart the consultant
Transcript
The Boss, Dogbert and Wally sit at a conference table. Dogbert says, "I recommend letting the engineers order their own supplies without management approval." Wally yells, "Yes!!! I'm rich!! Ha ha ha ha ha!!!" Dogbert continues, "And I recommend buying 'Put' options in your stock." Wally stands and says, "Whoo! Whoo! Whoo!"
Monday January 02,
1995
Tags #more work, #same tiny raises, #clever shift, #management philosophy, #simple application, #annoy, #effect pay
Transcript
Dilbert stands in front of the Boss who is seated at his desk. Dilbert says, "I accomplished twice as much as Wally this year, but we got exactly the same tiny raises." Dilbert says, "I'm wondering if this is a clever shift in management philosophy or a simple application of your ignorance?" The boss says, "You're starting to annoy me." Dilbert replies, "And that would affect my pay how?"
Friday January 06,
1995
Tags #ass six meetings, #customer focus, #micro management, #egomaniacal mahifest, #survival, #paper towels, #mens room
Transcript
Dilbert stands in front of the Boss's desk. Reading a report, the Boss says, "Change these dates . . . and add six more meetings and use the phrase 'customer focus.'" Dilbert looks down at the desk where a tiny figure has appeared. Dilbert says, "Uh-Oh . . . your micro-management has caused my ego to manifest itself and beg for survival." The tiny figure says, "I'm shrinking!" The Boss splats the tiny figure with a fly swatter and says to Dilbert, "Run and get me some paper towels . . . five of them . . . from the men's room."