Managing By Exception Comic Strips - Page 4

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View 31 - 40 results for managing by exception comic strips. Discover the best "Managing By Exception" comics from Dilbert.com.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #drug treatment program, #drug problem, #childproof container

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Dilbert, Wally, and The Boss sitting at table. While holding a document, The Boss says, "No one in my division is using the company drug treatment program. This is very embarassing." The Boss continues, "My boss will think I'm not managing the drug problem. Don't ANY of you have a drug problem?" Alice, sitting next to Dilbert and Wally, struggles to open a pill container. She exclaims in a frustrated manner, "#!*% Childproof 'Midol' container!!"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #no meetings, #change software, #software settings, #boss, #good work

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Dilbert sits in his cubicle. Dilbert thinks, "I don't have any meetings today." Dilbert thinks, "I'll change all my software settings until something soesn't work." The Boss pokes his head into Dilbert's cubicle. The Boss says, "Keep up the good work." Dilbert says, "Keep up the good managing."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #moral issues, #summarize, #appropriate categoires, #managers incompetent, #arrogant, #micromanaging, #msiogynists, #time of month

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Alice and the boss sit at a table. The boss has a lap top in front of him and says, "Tell me what moral issues you have. I'll summarize them under the appropiate categories." Alice says, "My managers are incompetent, arrogant, micro-managing misogynists." The boss says, "That's one under "time of the month."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #20% more money, #hire someone, #loyal, #40% more, #science, #mime, #wall blocks

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Dilbert is in the boss's office and he says to the boss: "Another company offered me twenty percent more. Will you match it? The boss answers: "No, I prefer to hire someone who is loyal, even if I have to pay forty percent more." Dilbert shakes his hands looking angry and says: "Managing is supposed to be a science!" The boss holds up his hands in front of him and says: "My mime wall blocks your sound."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #brenda utthead, #email addresses, #first inutial, #plus last name, #whiner, #butthead

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Brenda Utthead: I know our email addresses are supposed to be our first initial plans our last name. But could you make an exception? The Boss: No. That Brenda Utthead is quite a whiner,

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #strategic plan, #secret, #trust, #soabotage, #warranty, #chair

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Dilbert is in the boss' office. The boss says, "Make your report consistent with our strategic plan." Dilbert says, "What's out strategic plan?" The boss says, "It's a secret." Dilbert says, "Are you saying you don't trust me?" The boss says, "I don't think it's a coincidence that most employee sabotage is done by employees." Dilbert says, "How can I do my report if I don't know the strategy?! The boss says, "Okay, okay. I'll let you glance at it." The boss pulls a piece of paper out of his desk. The boss barely lets Dilbert see the paper. The boss says, "Time's up! That's long enough!" Dilbert says, "That's the warranty for your chair." The boss says, "Really? I've been managing to this for years."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #need approval, #equipment, #installed

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Dilbert says to The Boss, "I need your approval for this expense. The equipment is already here and installed." Dilbert continues, "I left out the description because you wouldn't understand it anyway." The Boss says to Catbert, "There's a fine line between managing and being totally useless." Catbert responds, "Luckily it looks the same."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #safety tip, #bend knees, #bang head, #art or science

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The Boss types, "Safety Tip of the Day:" The Boss continues typing, "Always bend your knees when banging your head against a wall." The Boss thinks, "I can't remember if managing is an art or a science."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #sexy project, #boost career, #sound good better job, #nano tech nology, #fighting terrorists

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The Boss: I need to be managing a sexier project to boost my career. \it only has to sound good and not fail until I geta better job. How about a nanotechnology set cell for fighting terrorists? Dilbert: O-O-OKay.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

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I'm too busy to learn anything about the projects I'm managing. "I barely have enough time to make critical decisions about them." "Maybe you're lazy and stupid." "Let's go down to the pond and throw rocks at the ducks."