Out Of Engineer Comic Strips - Page 4

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

1000 Results for Out Of Engineer

View 31 - 40 results for out of engineer comic strips. Discover the best "Out Of Engineer" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #annoyance, #envy, #useful member of society, #admiration, #respect, #peers, #talked out of

View Transcript

Transcript

Wally: I'm toying with the idea of becoming a useful member of society. Then I could enjoy the admiration and respect of my peers. Dilbert: The way you respect and admire me? Wally: Great! Now you've talked me out of it!

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #annoyance, #doctors' offices, #medicines, #whiny idiots, #pill, #doctor, #exam room, #office, #treadmill, #pass out, #medical

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: I'm sick of listening to whiny idiots. Do you have a pill for that? Doctor: I sure do! I took a handful of them this morning and I feel great in spite of your complaining! How funny would it be if I make you run on a treadmill until you pass out?

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #engineers, #honesty, #viruses, #honest opinions, #causing problems, #medical records, #engineer, #classified as disease, #vaccination, #engineering

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert says, "I can't stop voicing my honest opinions. It's causing problems at work." Doctor says, "According to your medical records, you're an engineer. We classify that as a disease now." Man says, "Gaaa!!! You haven't had your pon farr vaccination." Dilbert says, "Is it warm in here?"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #cruelty, #fraternization, #friendship, #new engineer, #ginat dork, #star wars chess set, #email, #set up date, #romantic preference, #relationships

View Transcript

Transcript

Carol: Have you met the new engineer? He's a gigantic dork. You two would get along great. I'll email him to set up a date with you. Is tomorrow good? Dilbert: Being a dork is not a romantic preference. Carol: He says he'll bring his "Star Wars" chess set.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #gadgets, #scientific equipment, #data center, #lights out, #eliminate problems, #moving cables, #power cords, #ruining everything, #speakerphone, #humans are germs, #science

View Transcript

Transcript

Voice: The data center is evolving into a "lights out" operation. Employees will no longer be allowed in the data center. We hope to eliminate all of the problems that humans cause by moving cables, unplugging power cords, and ruining everything with their dirt and static. Dilbert: He makes it sound as if the data center is alive and we humans are nothing but germs. Alice: By the way, who called this meeting and who's on the speakerphone? Dilbert: Are you... the data center? Noise: CLICK. Dilbert: I have a bad feeling about this.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #complaining, #conversation, #get mad, #point out dumb, #helpful, #doctor, #Dogbert, #medical

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: I wonder why people get mad when I point out how dumb they are. I'm just trying to be helpful. I don't want people going through life not knowing what the problem is. I'm kind of like a doctor. Dogbert: I stopped listening back at the house.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #keep brain out, #laziness, #long and complicated, #technical recommendation, #thinking, #make decision

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: Did you read my technical recommendation? Boss: No. It's too long and complicated. Dilbert: How do you plan to make a decision without reading it? Boss: I'll use my gut. Dilbert: It's probably a good idea to keep your brain out of this. Boss: Quiet! It's saying something. Noise: GROWL.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #anxiety, #stress, #burned out, #gray hair, #don't handle stress

View Transcript

Transcript

Man: I'm burned out by this job. Is that a gray hair? Dilbert: Have we met? Man: I started yesterday. I don't handle stress well.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #gadgets, #market, #bigger phone, #design, #market niche, #mind out of niche

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: There's room in the market for a device that's bigger than a phone but smaller than a tablet. Dilbert: So you want me to design something that is a bad tablet and an even worse phone? Boss: To my mind, it's a market niche. Dilbert: Maybe you should get your mind out of your niche.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #being a jerk, #big picture, #breaking up tasks, #emotionally gutted, #engineer, #engineers, #individual tasks, #losing will to live, #meetings, #personal life, #project plan, #rational plan, #sense of purpose, #engineering

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: Any comments on the project plan? Dilbert: When you consider all of the tasks together, they form a rational plan. But our individual tasks are so far removed from the big picture that they are stripped of meaning. You've managed to remove all sense of purpose from my life. On an intellectual level, I understand the benefits of breaking tasks into small chunks. But you've left me emotionally gutted. As I read your plan, I'm losing my will to live. Boss: Can't you find meaning in your personal life? Tina: He's an engineer. Dilbert: Now you're just being a jerk.