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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 17, 1992's comic on:


Tags #Dogbert, #Dilbert, #laughed, #joke, #hard, #inhaled, #snorted, #time, #choked, #spit, #lurch, #bonk, #head, #coffee, #table, #ignoring, #life, #boring

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Dilbert sits in his chair reading the newspaper and Dogbert sits on Dilbert's legs. Dogbert asks, "Remember the time you laughed at your own joke so hard that you inhaled and snorted at the same time?" Dogbert continues, "Then you choked on your own spit, which caused you to lurch over and bonk your head on the coffee table . . ." Dogbert asks, "Who says your life is boring?" Dilbert replies, "I'm ignoring you."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 25, 1992's comic on:


Tags #Dogbert, #beavers, #busy, #time, #common, #stereotype, #lazy, #build, #home, #rent

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Dogbert: I always thought you beavers were busy all the time. Beaver: That's a common stereotype. I'm actually quite lazy. Dogbert: How do you build your beaver home? Beaver: I rent.

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share February 05, 1993's comic on:


Tags #cars, #clean, #letters, #express, #outrage, #editor, #Funny, #pages, #sarcasm, #children, #Dilbert, #Dogbert, #time

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The caption says, "Their cars are always clean." A man polishes his car with a cloth. The caption says, "They write letters to express their outrage." A man sits at a table with an open newspaper next to him. The man writes, "Dear Editor, The funny pages is no place for sarcasm! Think about the CHILDREN!" The caption says, "They read the same book more than once." Dilbert sits in his chair reading a book and laughing. Dogbert says, "They are the people with way too much time on their hands."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share February 15, 1993's comic on:


Tags #the boss, #Dilbert, #alice, #team, #spirit, #free, #time, #job, #motivate, #bogged, #down, #details

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The Boss says to Dilbert, Wally and Alice, "In order to build team spirit I've decided you should have lunch together once a week." The Boss continues, "I won't be there myself because it would seriously cut into my free time." The Boss continues, "Besides, it's my job to motivate, not get bogged down in the details."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share February 23, 1993's comic on:


Tags #Dilbert, #Dogbert, #ratbert, #falls, #hole, #fabric, #space, #beautiful, #secrets, #time

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Dilbert and Dogbert look at a hole in midair. Dilbert yells into the hole, "What's it look like, Ratbert?" Ratbert floats through space and says, "It's beautiful . . . I see the secrets of time revealed . . . An object approaches . . ." Ratbert says, "It's Dick Clark's hair."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 24, 1993's comic on:


Tags #Dilbert, #Dogbert, #computer, #romostatic, #real-time, #data, #compression, #plug, #darling, #church

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Dogbert sits in the chair. Dilbert says, "Look what I got for my computer! It's a romostatic real-time data compression processor!" Dilbert walks away saying, "Oooh . . . I can't wait to plug you in, my little darling. I've waited so long." Dilbert says, "Oh yes! Yes!" Dogbert asks, "Does the church know about this?"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share February 14, 1994's comic on:


Tags #desparation, #fabric of spce, #fear, #helpless, #meeting forever, #time division, #marketing guy

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Wally: what shall we tell the guy from marketing this time? Dilbert: hee hee Let's see if we can make him feel a sense of helpless desperation and fear. The time -division multiplexer opened a hole in the fabric of space. Wally: we're trapped in this meeting forever.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 14, 1994's comic on:


Tags #huge time saver, #final consulting, #company, #deadweight, #employees.fired, #company directory, #business

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Ratbert: Here's my final consulting report on your company. Ive listed all the deadweight employees who should be fired. The Boss: This is the company directory. Ratbert: Finding that was a huge time saver.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 07, 1994's comic on:


Tags #video conference, #desktop, #telecommuting, #level of professionalism, #share document, #next time

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"This desktop video conference thing is great!" "Even though you're telecommuting, you still maintain a level of professionalism." "Let's share a document next time."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 05, 1994's comic on:


Tags #final design, #zebra, #fisnih on time, #canceled project, #month ago, #legal, #binder, #dont travel

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Dilbert: Here's the final design for Project 'Zebra'. I worked day and night for weeks to finish it on time. The Boss: I canceled that project a month ago, I meat to tell you. Dilbert: In some countries it would be legal to kill you with this binder, The Boss: Thats why I don't travel.