Sound Of Breaking Comic Strips - Page 4

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209 Results for Sound Of Breaking

View 31 - 40 results for sound of breaking comic strips. Discover the best "Sound Of Breaking" comics from Dilbert.com.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #fixed satellite, #surround sound, #water filter, #dates fix it guys

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Dilbert says, "I fixed your satellite dish connection and tuned your surround sound system. Now can we go on our date?" A womany says, "That was our date. In ten minutes I'm dating a guy who will replace the water filter in my refrigerator." Dilbert says, "I can do that." A woman says, "You're welcome to stay and fight him for it."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #typos in email, #confused, #point, #more professional, #clear, #efficient meassages, #gossipy, #cruitical, #time waster, #scoffing sound

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"Did you see all of the typos in Dilbert's e-mail?" "Were you confused about its meaning?" "No, that's not the point." "Then I don't know what your point is." "I think he should be more professional. That's all." "So, instead of sending clear, efficient messages, he should follow your example and..." "...Be a gossipy, critical, time-waster who values appearance over function?" "Are you done hurting me now?" "I'm saving a scoffing sound for when you turn to leave."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #allegiance, #work has no meaning, #sound disloyal

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Dilbert: My work has no meaning. I understand it's your job to fix that situation before I become disloyal. Boss: I think it's too late. You already sound disloyal. Dilbert: Really? That opens a lot of options. Boss: Let me know if there's anything else I can do.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #behind schedule, #obstical, #projects, #sound dumb, #three engineers, #time management skills

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Boss: All of your projects are behind schedule. You need to work on your time management skills. Dilbert:Let me see if I understand you correctly. You expect me to do the job of three engineers... ...and the only obstical to your brilliant plan os my poor time management? Boss: Stop making everything I say sound dumb. Dilbert: I dont do it that often. Because you only sound dumb when people understand what you mean. Boss: And thats too Often! Dilbert: Once a week tops.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #joking, #laughter, #medicine, #neck pain, #sleep, #sound wise, #slept wrong, #employee, #employer, #health

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Boss: My neck is killing me. I must have slept wrong. Dilbert: Ha ha ha! You can't even sleep right! I'm doing you a favor because laughter is the best medicine. Hee hee! Boss: Why does that no longer sound wise?!!

Alice Breaks Up With Boyfriend

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 Alice Breaks Up With Boyfriend - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #breakup, #dating, #breaking up, #drone, #stalking, #follow, #spying, #attention, #relationships

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Alice: I'm breaking up with you because you don't give me enough attention. All you care about is your stupid aerial photography hobby. I wish you the best. That felt like a clean break.

Breaking Up With Robot

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Breaking Up With Robot - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #robot, #dating, #programming, #free will, #emotions, #cruelty, #relationships, #technology

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Alice: I met another robot. I'm breaking up with you. Robot: Okay. Alice: I need you to feel bad about this, so I'm uploading some code that makes you suffer. Robot: That sounds sadistic. Alice: Stop being selfish.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #employees, #engineers, #revenge, #loud talker, #chronic faltualator, #seating arrangements, #cubicle arrangements, #sound, #noise, #business

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Office relocation Alice says, "Your floor plan puts me between a loud talker and a chronic flatulator." Tina says, "I could move you to a cubicle between a guy who clears his throat all day and a woman who laughs too much." Alice says, "Is this because I once said you aren't smart enough to be an engineer?" Tina says, "Look what I engineered?" Office Relocation

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #annoyance, #office buildings, #open workspace, #environemnt, #crying baby spunds, #more distractions

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Boss: The company is considering moving from cubicles to an open workspace environment. Dilbert: Great idea. Can we add some crying babies and the sound of water dripping? Boss: You're being stupid. Dilbert: Maybe I'll be smarter when I have more distractions.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #employees, #gloating, #quit working, #won lotery, #business

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Dilbert: If you won the lottery, would you quit working? Wally: I quit working years ago, but I might start gloating if it isn't too hard. Dilbert: Gloating doesn't sound hard. Wally: Can I do it without moving any facial muscles? I have weak eyebrows.