Special Project Comic Strips - Page 4
716 Results for Special Project
View 31 - 40 results for special project comic strips. Discover the best "Special Project" comics from Dilbert.com.
Share September 11, 1991's comic on:
A man says to George Lucas, "There's a dog here to see you, sir. He may be on to our operation." Lucas asks Dogbert, "Yes?" Dogbert says, "I came to find out if the news on television is all faked by your special effects company." Lucas and Dogbert sit at a table. Lucas says, "Actually, we don't do ALL of the news here. We had to sub-contract the Dan Quayle stuff to the Muppets." Dogbert says, "I knew that."
Share December 02, 1991's comic on:
The Boss points to a monkey and says, "Dilbert, your new co-worker is Zimbu the Monkey." The Boss says, "Zimbu learned English from the zoo keepers in a special program." Dilbert says, "This monkey is an insult to the intelligence of the other workers and I!" Zimbu corrects Dilbert, "Other workers and 'me,' not 'I.'"
Share December 14, 1991's comic on:
Dilbert sits at his desk working on his computer and Dogbert sits next to him. Dilbert says, "Knowledge is power, Dogbert." Dilbert continues, "Someday, the people who know how to use computers will rule over those who don't." Dilbert continues, "And they will have a special name for us." Dogbert says, "Secretaries."
Share August 24, 1992's comic on:
Dilbert sits at his desk. The Boss enters holding a newspaper and says, "There are two good articles in the paper today; one about magnets, and one on sign language." The Boss continues, "I'd like you to write a white paper on how these items could influence the project you're working on." Dilbert asks, "Do you even know what project I'm working on?" The Boss replies, "I don't have time to get into minutia."
Share November 02, 1992's comic on:
A customer sits across from Dogbert's desk. The boy says, "I've failed the driving test nine times. Can you help?" Dogbert replies, "I specialize in the problem cases. Just sign the application form." The boy looks at the pencil and says, "Wait . . . I've seen one of these before. Yes, there's something special about the pointy end . . . But what?" Dogbert thinks, "Uh oh."
Share January 27, 1993's comic on:
Dilbert says to a man, "Hi, Tim. What are you working on these days?" Tim replies, "A secret project." Tim continues, "Very, very secret. Confidential and proprietary. Real hush-hush." Dilbert says, "It sounds important." Tim points a gun at Dilbert and says, "Just move along."
Share April 23, 1993's comic on:
Dilbert says to a classroom of children, "The goal of every engineer is to retire without getting blamed for a major catastrophe." Dilbert continues, "Engineers prefer to work as 'consultants' on project teams. That way there's no real work, blame is spread across the group, and you can crush any idea from marketing!" Dilbert continues, ". . . And sometimes you get free donuts just for showing up!" The teacher says, "Get out of my classroom."
Share July 19, 1993's comic on:
The Boss says to an employee, "Your new project will have no budget and no management support. Expect to spend most of your time giving status reports." The man's head disappears and he thinks, "Oh no! The life force has been drained out of me! I'm becoming a damp rag!!!" Dilbert looks at the floor and says, "That's amazing." The Boss replies, "It's nothing. I did eighteen at once at the employee empowerment brunch."
Share September 08, 1993's comic on:
Dilbert and Wally sit at a conference table with a man from marketing. The man says, "You engineers have done NOTHING on my project. You just keep saying I haven't given you sufficient requirements!" The man throws his arms up in frustration and says, "I don't know what else you need and you won't tell me what you need!! Is this just your way of avoiding work??!" Wally replies, "I'll bet you regret choosing marketing as a career path." Dilbert adds, "It looks like a lot of work."
Share January 10, 1994's comic on:
The Boss: "Let's go around the table and give an update on each of our projects." Man: "My project is a pathetic series of poorly planned, near-random acts. My life is a tragedy of emotional desperation." The boss: "It's more or less customary to say things are going fine." Man: "I think I need a hug."