Spit Take Comic Strips - Page 4

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702 Results for Spit Take

View 31 - 40 results for spit take comic strips. Discover the best "Spit Take" comics from Dilbert.com.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 24, 2001's comic on:


Tags #accounting trolls, #spit on data, #tour of department

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Headline: Accounting Trolls. One troll encourages the other, "Go ahead, Larry spit on his data." Larry lunges forward and spits, "PTOO!!" Dilbert is covered in spit. A troll says to him, "Can I give you a little tour of our department?"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 22, 2002's comic on:


Tags #dilebrt the sales guy, #mother, #overpirced, #hard to use, #spit, #packaging, #mom, #surprised, #mother and son, #Family

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Headline: Dilbert the Sales Guy. Dilbert's mom is holding his product. She says, "I wouldn't buy this @#!%!!& with YOUR money." Dilbert's mom continues, "It's overpriced, hard to use, full of bugs and it solves no problem." Dilbert's mom continues, "I spit on your packaging!" Dilbert responds, "Um.. Mom.."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 05, 2002's comic on:


Tags #vacant private offcie, #last one, #ill-will, #coworkers, #diltopia, #take off shoes, #reverence

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Dilbert is carrying a box. He says to Alice, "I'm moving into a vacant private office. I got the last one." Dilbert continues, "I hope this doesn't cause ill-will in the cubicle-bound co- workers I'm leaving behind." Alice furrows her brow. Dilbert continues, "All I ask is that when you enter Diltopia, you bow in reverence and take off your shoes." Alice clenches her teeth in anger.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 09, 2002's comic on:


Tags #rat hole, #business plan, #pay huge investment fees, #money losing, #take your money, #push in hole

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Dogbert is sitting outside behind a desk labeled, "Rat Hole." A businessman approaches holding a bag of money and asks, "May I throw money down the rat hole?" Dogbert replies, "Show me your business plan." Dogbert flips through the business plan and says, "You plan to pay huge investment banking fees to buy a low-margin, money-losing business..." Dogbert says, "For an extra fee, I'll push you in the hold and take your money." The businessman replies, "Oooh, sounds good."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share February 14, 2003's comic on:


Tags #stagger lunch, #someone here, #know in adavnce, #take a pill, #pecking order, #errands

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The Boss addresses a meeting, "From now on, I want you to stagger your lunch so someone is always here." Asok exclaims, "Gaaa! As the lowest person in the pecking order, I will never know in advance when I can eat." Asok yells, "It is the end of errands as I know them!!" The Boss turns and says, "Sheesh, take a pill."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share February 17, 2003's comic on:


Tags #take call, #excuse me, #inconsiderate guts, #crushing head, #imagine

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Dilbert is in a meeting. His coworker's cell phone rings. The coworker says, "Excuse me while I take this call." Dilbert replies, "Okay." Just as the coworker is about the answer his phone, Dilbert says, "Excuse me while I hate your inconsiderate guts." The coworker turns away annoyed and says into his phone, "No, nothing important." Dilbert continues, "Excuse me while I imagine crushing your head."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share February 19, 2003's comic on:


Tags #100 hrs a week, #ask for raise, #top secret facilit, #super genius, #resume, #honest, #take one, #know one

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An interviewee says to The Boss, "If you hire me, I'll work a hundred hours a week and never ask for a raise!" The interviewee continues, "I went to school at a top-secret facility for super geniuses; that's why it's not on my resume." The Boss says to Catbert, "And I'm sure it's all true because he says he's honest!" Catbert replies, "Apparently it doesn't take one to know one."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 09, 2003's comic on:


Tags #body double, #despots, #most successful, #double, #take hit, #personal dress code, #dress intern

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Dogbert stands on The Boss' desk and says, "You need a body double. They're popular with your most successful despots." Dogbert continues, "If someone tries to ambush you into making a decision, the double will take the hit." The Boss approaches Asok with a pointy-haired hat in his hands and says, "I want you to think of this as your own personal dress code."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 28, 2003's comic on:


Tags #extortion magazine, #more ad space, #week old spit, #half page ad

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Carol hands The Boss a magazine and says, "Our products got reviewed in the new issue of 'Extortion Magazine.'" The Boss reads, "If they had bought more ad space in this magazine, we would not compare their products to week-old spit." Carol says, "It's better than last month." The Boss responds, "I'll bet we can get to 'day-old' with another half-page ad."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 09, 2003's comic on:


Tags #new corporate code, #report immediately, #señor management, #ship prodcuts, #defective, #take care, #lying, #report you

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The Boss addresses a meeting, "If you see anyone violating the new corporate code of ethics, report it immediately." Dilbert raises his hand and says, "I'd like to report our senior management for telling us to ship products that we know are defective." The Boss responds, "Yes, I will take care of that." Dilbert waves one hand, points his finger at The Boss with the other, and says, "Oooh! Oooh! Lying!!! I report you!!!"