Startegic Engineer Group Comic Strips - Page 4

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

366 Results for Startegic Engineer Group

View 31 - 40 results for startegic engineer group comic strips. Discover the best "Startegic Engineer Group" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 20, 1993's comic on:


Tags #Dilbert, #class, #engineer, #technical, #writing, #reads, #scapegoat, #vacation

View Transcript

Transcript

A school teacher says to a classroom of children, "Dilbert has agreed to talk to the class about exciting careers in the field of engineering!" Dilbert says to the students, "There's more to being an engineer than just writing technical memos that nobody reads." Dilbert continues, "Once in a while, somebody reads one. Then you have to find a scapegoat, or use some vacation time and hope it all blows over."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 22, 1993's comic on:


Tags #Dilbert, #class, #career, #social, #life, #engineer, #bonanza, #ladies, #field, #video games, #devices, #non-engineer

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert stands in front of a classroom of children saying, "And don't forget the social life that comes with being an engineer." Dilbert continues, "Ninety percent of all engineers are guys, so it's a bonanza of dating opportunities for the ladies who enter the field." Dilbert continues, "For the men, there are these little video game devices . . ." A little girl raises her hand and asks, "Would I be allowed to date a non-engineer?"

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 11, 1994's comic on:


Tags #small group, #young, #Funny, #single people, #socialize, #romances, #ski trips

View Transcript

Transcript

Tina: "Dilbert, I'm forming a small clique of all the young, funny, single people in the department." "We'll have drinks during lunch, talk about ski trips, and have romances within the group." Dilbert: "Please...just shoot me now." Tina: "No, no...we need you to do our work."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share February 12, 1994's comic on:


Tags #baby dogbert, #ceramic figurine, #first aid, #vomiting, #focus group, #disater, #inmate cuteness, #profit

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert: I found a way to profit from my innate cuteness. Introducing the limited edition "Baby Dogbert" ceramic figurine! Dilbert: I see - its a first aid device to induce vomiting. Dogbert: The focus group was a disaster.

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 09, 1994's comic on:


Tags #dogumentray, #engineer at work, #director dog, #directing dilbert, #jumps into action, #focus, #moved mouse, #screen saver, #deactivated

View Transcript

Transcript

"As my dogumentary begins, we see the engineer hard at work." "Suddenly, he leaps into action! Years of training and experience come into focus!" "The screen saver has been deactivated. But doubt sets in...was there a better way?" "I should have moved the mouse."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 06, 1994's comic on:


Tags #managing, #marketing group, #previous manager killed, #parking lot, #run down, #murder, #apathy to murder, #body on bumper

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss: "In addition to my current duties, I'll be managing the marketing group." "The marketing job opened because the previous manager got run down in the parking lot." "When they needed a good manager, they knew where to look." Dilbert: "Under your bumper?"

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 08, 1994's comic on:


Tags #two people, #focus group, #loved prodcut, #not statistically useful, #free food, #sandwhiches

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss: Two people in a focus group loved our product. So we're doubling our production. Dilbert: The opinions of two people are not statically useful. ...especially if you're one of the two people. The boss: I knew those free sandwiches were too good to be true.

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 12, 1994's comic on:


Tags #key boards replaced, #motion sensing, #computer screen, #3d image, #technical professionals, #engineer, #moron, #engineering

View Transcript

Transcript

"Dogbert the Futurist" Dogbert: "Someday, keyboards will be replaced by motion-sensing rings on your fingers..." "The computer screen will be projected into your glasses as a 3-D image." - These developments will not enhance the image of technical professionals." Dilbert: "Are you an engineer?" Moron: "I'm a moron. Common mistake."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 26, 1994's comic on:


Tags #new name for group, #engineering science research, #designed business cards, #long name, #complicated

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss, Dilbert and Wally sit at a conference table. The Boss says, "I came up with a new name for our group." The Boss continues, "From now on we're the 'Engineering Science Research Technology Systems Information Quality and Excellence Center.'" Wally says, "You should throw 'efficiency' in there too." The Boss holds up a long piece of paper and says, "I designed the business cards myself."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 09, 1994's comic on:


Tags #high income group, #can afford product, #rich, #tasteless, #easily amused, #located a cluster, #dog, #golf course, #animals

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert and Alice watch as Dogbert points to a diagram and says, "Your target market is the high income group. They're the only ones who can afford your product." Dogbert continues, "More specifically, they must be rich, tasteless and easily amused. I've located a cluster of them to study." Dogbert stands behind a bush on a golf course and watches two golfers. One golfer says, "That dog's watching us golf again."