Step Comic Strips - Page 4

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

54 Results for Step

View 31 - 40 results for step comic strips. Discover the best "Step" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share February 05, 2000's comic on:


Tags #limbo, #a division of heck, #career limbo section, #wait to be seated

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert is at the threshold of an entrance bearing the sign: "Limbo, a division of Heck." Phil, the Ruler of Heck, tells Dilbert: "Step inside." Inside, standing by a "Please wait to be seated" sign, Phil informs Dilbert: "You'll be sitting in the Career Limbo section. Goodbye." Arms akimbo, Dilbert thinks to himself: "Jeepers! The service here is terrible!"

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 31, 2000's comic on:


Tags #network server, #certifed, #power of certifciation, #embarrassing, #c for certified, #superman tech, #class, #forgets

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert stands in front of a computer typing. A man dressed as a superhero with a 'C' on his chest says, "Step away from that network server! I'm certified!" The man sits in front of the computer, raises his arms and calls, "I summon the vast power of certification!!!" The man looks at the computer and says, "Well, this is embarassing; that's all I remember from the classes."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share September 17, 2003's comic on:


Tags #audio lessons, #hundred million, #showing up, #performing ceo, #be the person, #buy audio lessons

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert: Would you like to make a hundred million dollars for just showing up at work? Dogbert: My audio lessons teach you how to become an underperforming CEO. $19.95 Step One: become A CEO> Step Two: Be the sort who would buy these audio lessons.

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 30, 2003's comic on:


Tags #office relocation, #studied boss, #learned methods, #corner you, #scream about bright light

View Transcript

Transcript

"I am in charge of the office relocation project, also known as O.R.P." "I have never managed anything, but I have studied our boss to learn his methods." "Let's see.. step one, I corner you. Step two, I talk until you scream about seeing a bright light."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 06, 2006's comic on:


Tags #asok, #survival methods, #indian institutet of technology, #wounded rodent, #tickle hawk, #find highway

View Transcript

Transcript

I must use the survival methods I learned at the Indian Institute of Technology. "Step one: Pretend to be a wounded rodent." "Now look for the highway and tickle the hawk with its own feather."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 11, 2012's comic on:


Tags #lifesaving, #office workers, #interns, #accident, #organs harvested, #to save intern

View Transcript

Transcript

Asok: I know it feels unimportant to be an intern to another intern, but if I ever get into a serious accident then... Coworker: I would step into your job? Asok: I was going to say your organs will be harvested to save me, but now you've made it awkward. Coworker: Sorry!

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 04, 2012's comic on:


Tags #work ethic, #employee survey, #respect and dignity, #feel gross, #disgust, #paper towel

View Transcript

Transcript

Catbert: The first question on the employee survey is... Do you feel you are valued and treated with respect and dignity? Dilbert: Well, let me put it this way... you know how sometimes you step in something gross and then you have to wipe it off your shoe with a paper towel? Catbert: So... you feel like the paper towel? Dilbert: No, the paper towel has a purpose. Catbert: So... you feel like the gross stuff on the shoe? Dilbert: No, the gross stuff gets to leave. I feel like a shoe that has gross stuff on the bottom and a sweaty foot shoved all the way to the end of its sole. Catbert: I'll leave this one blank. Dilbert: Because my opinions don't matter?

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 31, 2013's comic on:


Tags #fear, #inventions, #machine learning, #track customers, #machines take over, #annihilate all humans

View Transcript

Transcript

CEO: Our machine learning technology allows us to track customer preferences and use that knowledge to manipulate them. Dilbert: That seems like the step that happens right before the machines take over the earth and annihilate all humans. CEO: There's always one person in every crowd who says that. Dilbert: Not for much longer, apparently.

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 08, 2008's comic on:


Tags #employees, #meeting, #miss step, #mole hired, #reporting, #chilling effect, #business

View Transcript

Transcript

RAtBert: I'm the official department mole. I'll be reporting your every misstep to your pointy-haired boss. Dilbert: Won't this have a chilling effect on our creativity and honesty?" RatBert: That didn't take long.

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share February 25, 2008's comic on:


Tags #dinosuar, #law suit, #no interuptions, #prior employee, #slapped, #slapped with a suit, #take off, #business suit

View Transcript

Transcript

Bob: Im Bob the esquire dinosaur. your exemployee, wally, hired me to step you with a suit for hiring him. Take off your suit is I can slap you with it. Carol: Not now, He's being slapped with a suit and I don't want top ruin the rhythm.