Strong Abs Comic Strips - Page 4

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

39 Results for Strong Abs

View 31 - 39 results for strong abs comic strips. Discover the best "Strong Abs" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #story, #topping, #bragging, #ridiculous, #lying, #annoyed

View Transcript

Transcript

Topper Alice says, "I went for a long walk yesterday." Topper says, "That's nothing." Topper says, "My thighs are so strong that I'm afraid to jump rope when the sun is directly overhead." Alice says, "You're full of beans." Man says, "Exactly. That's how I achieve escape velocity."

Top Dilbert Searches

marketing, project, cloud, catbert, leadership, budget, birthday, engineer, time sheet, sales, wally, strategy, dogbert, powerpoint, project management, topper, leader, boss, change, meeting, data, management, mordac

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #manager of executive compensation, #plan to steal, #meeting, #back slapping, #pormises, #raises, #ponys, #vacations, #huge raise, #business

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: "I'd like you to meet Bradley, our new manager of executive compensation." Boss: "Bradley's job is to recommend to our board how much to pay company executives such as me." "Bradley is totally objective." Bradley: "Totally." "That was a world-class observation, so I'll recommend that the company buy you a pony." "...A STRONG pony to carry the huge bags of cash I recommend for you." Boss: "Good work, Bradley. I'll recommend to the board that you get a huge raise!" Dilbert: "Gaaa!! Stop pretending to have reasons!! Just steal the stupid money!!!" Boss: "See what I have to deal with every day?" Bradley: "Would an extra month of vacation reduce the sting?"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #can't breathe, #demonstration, #evil eye process, #new consultant, #paper cut bleeding, #rasputin, #charisma

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss says to his staff, "This is Rasputin, our new consultant." The Boss continues, "He stopped my paper cut from bleeding." The Boss says to everyone, "He has charisma." Alice says, "I'd like to see a demonstration on Asok." Rasputin looks at Asok fiercely. Asok nervously says, "Ack...can't breathe..." The Boss says to everyone, "That's called the evil eye process. Now do Wally." Rasputin begins to stare at Wally. Wally replies, "Ack...can't breathe..." Wally drops to the floor and the Boss says, "He never had a chance." Dilbert replies, "Your anti-charisma is strong today."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #honesty, #managers & supervisors, #secret of success, #plan b, #two hairballs, #business

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: Asok, the secret to success is making your boss look good. Asok: What if my boss looks like two hairballs on an infected bladder? There's no way to make that look good. Boss: You're not off to a strong start. Asok: Please tell me there's a Plan B.

Zimbu Tests The App

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Zimbu Tests The App - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #technology, #addiction, #stimulus, #animal testing, #social media

View Transcript

Transcript

Narrator: Zimbu The Monkey. Dilbert: We need to do animal testing on our new app. Do you mind taking a look? Zimbu: I'm getting a strong dopamine hit every time I click on it. Ooh! Ooh! Ooh! Dilbert: May I have it back? Zimbu: Put that hand away before I bite it off.

Ai Can Control Minds

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Ai Can Control Minds - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #control, #intelligence, #office workers, #robot, #technology, #humans

View Transcript

Transcript

Man: We've developed an A.I. with such strong persuasion skills it can control human minds. Dilbert: Obviously, we have to stop the project and destroy all of the code to prevent it from spreading. Man: The A.I. says I need to ignore you.

New Tv Ad

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
New Tv Ad - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #argument, #business ethics, #marketing, #men and women, #office workers, #relations between the sexes, #accuse

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: Ben, from marketing, is here to give us a preview of our new tv ad. Ben: The opening scene shows a bunch of men who are weak and stupid, failing to solve a common problem. Then a confident and strong woman enters and solves the problem with ease. Dilbert: Isn't that incredibly sexist? Ben: No, because only the men are weak and stupid. Dilbert: And that's not sexist? Ben: Why are you being so weak and stupid? You sound like a bigot. Dilbert: I'll be quiet now. Wally: As quickly as it began, the rebellion was quashed.

Believing Experts

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Believing Experts - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #debates, #Opinion, #expert, #facts, #current events, #Politics

View Transcript

Transcript

Man: Haha! You idiot! How dare you dis-agree with the foremost experts in this field! Dilbert: Here's a breaking story about those same experts being arrested today for falsifying data. In a sane world, this information would serve to modify your strong opinion. Man: That's not how any of this works.

Dunning Kruger

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Dunning Kruger - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #health, #sarcasm, #business, #dunning-kruger effect, #psychology, #narcissist, #glory, #coffee

View Transcript

Transcript

tina: the dunning-kruger effect is strong in you. dilbert: technically, you can't know if i am suffering from it or if you only think i am because you have it. tina: only a narcissist talks that way. dilbert: i feel as if i have no path to glory here.