Threat Comic Strips - Page 4

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53 Results for Threat

View 31 - 40 results for threat comic strips. Discover the best "Threat" comics from Dilbert.com.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags access, apprval, blocked website, cip, director of hr, hostiliy, mean, threat

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This website has been blocked by your company. Dilbert: Mordac, I need access to a blocked site for business reasons, Mordac: I can only unblock the site if the director of human resources sends me a written approval. Catbert: I can only make recommendations, Our Cis still has to approve it. Chief Information Officer How dare you bother me with your trivial website problem! Carol back into your hole and think about the career mistake you just made! Dilbert: Can we kip the part where you ask me what I accomplished this week?

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags competition (psychology), elevators, fear, elevator, confrontation, threat, ceo, underling, power tripping

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CEO: Here's the hotshot that everyone says will someday take my job. I'm going to mentor you so hard your intestines will end up in your skull. Wally: I just figured out why people use the stairs.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags hypocrisy, mobile (cell) phones, phone rining, fired, judge, ironic, threat, legal

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Boss: Anyone whose phone rings during this meeting will be fired on the spot. RRRING! Stop judging me with your eyes. Dilbert: It's the only thing that keeps them open.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags burnt, camera, gadgets, glasses, threat, fire, revenge, skeletons

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Man 1: Hey, geek! We're going to beat you p for wearing glasses with a camera. Man 2: If I'm being honest, this didn't go the way I expected.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags ceos, executives, leadership, threat, internet, ruin journalist, off the record, reporters, bar conversation, negative article, criminally insane, brillaunet writer, venn diagram, technology

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Dilbert: There's a bad story about you on the Internet. Apparently, you described a plan to "ruin any journalist who writes an unfair story" about us. CEO: That was off the record! Dilbert: You said it in front of a dozen reporters at a business event. CEO: It was just bar conversation. I was making a point about fairness. Dilbert: Hmmm... but now no sane writer would write a negative article about us. I can't tell if you're a brilliant leader or criminally insane. CEO: I'd show you the Venn diagram they gave us in CEO school, but it just looks like a circle.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags change, fear, power, executives, decision, threat, hypocrisy

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CEO: You must learn to embrace change. Dilbert: Can we change anything we want to change? CEO: No. You don't get to say what the changes are. I do that. Alice: Will that situation ever change? CEO: No. Alice: Why not? You said change is good. CEO: Change is good. For other people. So embrace it or I'll fire you. Employees: We love change!!!

Who Alan Works For

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 Who Alan Works For - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags threat, motivation, fear, work ethic

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Alice: If you do what I tell you to do, I will nominate you for employee of the year. If not, I will spend the rest of my days spreading rumors about you. Terrible, terrible rumors. Dilbert: Hey, Alan. Who do you work for these days? Alan: Whoever scares me the most.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags mentor, mentorship, competition, honesty, truth

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Dilbert: I need some mentoring. Boss: This is awkward. On one hand, helping you would make me appear wise and generous. On the other hand, it would make you a more credible threat to take my job. I see you as more of an adversary than a subordinate. That's why I withhold vital information that you need to do your job. I've already said too much. Wally: Did you learn anything? Dilbert: Yes, unfortunately.

Boss Makes Dilbert Get Buy In

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Boss Makes Dilbert Get Buy In - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags managers, purpose, use, useful, threat

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Boss: I'll approve this if you get buy-in from the rest of the department. Dilbert: What value are you adding to that scenario? Boss: I'm not firing you. Dilbert: In that case, keep up the good work.

Looks Good But Won't Work

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Looks Good But Won't Work - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags ideas, impracticality, managers, leadership, threat

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Boss: The one they call Dilbert suggested we do something that looks good but won't work. CEO: Is this the first trace of management potential you've seen from him? Boss: You think it's a fluke? CEO: Let's keep an eye on it.