Video Of Birth Comic Strips - Page 4

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

105 Results for Video Of Birth

View 31 - 40 results for video of birth comic strips. Discover the best "Video Of Birth" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #wally disability, #spy on him, #need video evidence, #vigorous activity, #vigourously

View Transcript

Transcript

Standing on a table Catbert says to Asok the Intern, "Wally is out on disability. I want you to spy on him." Catbert goes on to say, with arms raised "We need video evidence of Wally doing a vigorous activity." Asok the Intern asks Alice while she faces the computer, "Can you think of anything that Wally does vigorously?" Alice replies without facing Asok the Intern, "I'd rather not."

Top Dilbert Searches

marketing, project, cloud, catbert, leadership, budget, birthday, engineer, time sheet, sales, wally, strategy, dogbert, powerpoint, project management, topper, leader, boss, change, meeting, data, management, mordac

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #security, #equipment removal, #authorization, #signatures, #turn tables, #sign form, #birth certificate

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert walks by the security desk with a computer part under his arm. The guard says, "Stop." The guard says, "Show me your "equipment removal authorization form." Dilbert shows him a piece of paper. The guard says, "This requires the signature of TWO employees." Dilbert hands the guard a pen and says, "Good catch. You'd better sign it so it's legal." The guard says, "This seems wrong... but I don't know why why." Dilbert says, "And I'll need to see your birth certificate" The guard says, "I don't have one." Dilbert says, "Then how do you know you were born?" The guard thinks, "I have baby pictures, but they could have been doctored by my alleged mom."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #all night, #comp day, #security video, #pile of debris, #cucbicle, #conversation, #jumping all over

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss is sitting at his desk. Wally enters and says, "I was here all night. Is it okay if I take tomorrow as a comp day?" The Boss replies, "According to our security video, you slept all night on a pile of debris in your cubicle." Wally replies, "Is it just me or is this conversation jumping all over the place?"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #dimwitted twins, #free long distance, #low cost video phones

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert: "My plan is to sell low-cost video-phones to dimwitted identical twins." Dogbert continues, "I'll even throw in free long-distance calling because that's the kind of guy I am." A man looks into a mirror and exclaims, "Gaaa!!! What are you doing at my girlfriend's house????"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #video compression, #electrical engineer, #only non engineeer, #stating obvious, #condescending

View Transcript

Transcript

Let me explain what video compression is... "Would you stop if I pointed out that everyone in this room except you is an electrical engineer?" "Zeros are round and fat compared to ones..." "I'm begging you..."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #sing or dance, #resigned, #huge resignation, #manifesto, #video clips, #humorous sound files, #website, #broadway theater prodcution, #first motivated employee, #technology

View Transcript

Transcript

Ted approaches Dilbert, "Can you sing or dance?" Dilbert turns to face Ted, "Ted? I thought you resigned in disgust two weeks ago." Ted replies, "Well...I wrote a huge resignation manifesto that I planned to e-mail to the entire company." With hands raised Ted says, "But I thought it needed pictures." With arms now raised to the side Ted says, "Before long I was adding video clips and humorous sound files." Exasperated Ted states, "Then I thought, hey, why not put it all on a website?" More calmed and reserved, Ted says "Now I'm turning the whole thing into an off Broadway theatre production." Arriving home after work, Dilbert says to Dogbert, "I saw my first motivated employee today."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #sales personnel, #cold calling, #video chat, #sales job, #computer, #selling on line, #skype, #technology

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: You're supposed to be cold calling sales prospects. Wally: I am. I'm using a video chat site to randomly meet potential customers. This guy is excited to see me, and that's half of the sales job right here.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #everyone informed, #out of loop, #witnessing birth, #birth of child, #envy, #project, #happy, #miracle

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss: It's too hard to keep everyone informed about everything. I've decided to take you out of the loop. Wally: Really?? Now I know what fathers mean when they talk about witnessing the birth of their children. Dilbert: Lucky!

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #bragging, #birth, #doubtful, #editing, #wikipedia, #lying

View Transcript

Transcript

Topper Carol says, "My first baby weighed 12 pounds. I gave birth in the cap of a stolen backhoe." Topper says, "That's nothing!" Topper says, "I once passed a gallstone so big that it became secretary of labor in the Clinton administration." Carol says, "I find that hard to believe." Topper says, "Give me ten minutes and then check wikipedia."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #presentation, #marketing video, #comments, #finished, #annoyed, #technology, #false, #wrong, #angry, #arms out, #Funny, #glare

View Transcript

Transcript

Woman says, "And that's our new marketing video. We hope it will go viral." The Boss says, "You'll have our comments by tomorrow." Woman says, "I'm not asking for comments. The video is already finished." Dilbert says, "The technology claims in the video are criminally inaccurate." Woman says, "I sent the script to engineering for comments three months ago!" Woman says, "I got an email back from someone named Wally who said it was great." Wally says, "I thought she was asking if it was funny."