War Comic Strips - Page 4
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43 Results for War
View 31 - 40 results for war comic strips. Discover the best "War" comics from Dilbert.com.
Sunday August 10,
1997
Tags project sparkle, desk policy, company wide effoert, tiny question, curious, top executives, competitive threat, panic, lone voice of reason, paper towles, laminated card, mission statement
Transcript
At a meeting, The Boss says, "Announcing Project 'Sparkle', the clean desk policy." The Boss says, "This is a company wide effort to keep our work spaces clean." Alice says, "Tiny question. I'm curious about one thing." Alice says, "I'm picturing our top executives in the 'War Room.'" Alice waves her arms wildly and says, "They talk about the competitive threat and our lack of resources. Suddenly, panic sets in!!" Alice is wide eyed and finishes, "A lone voice of reason penetrates the confusion. Two words: Paper towels." Alice asks, "Is that pretty much how it went?" The Boss says, "Moving along. Each of you get a laminated card with our mission statement." Wally puts his arm out to restrain Alice and says, "Let me do this one." Dilbert just watches it go by. The only reason he's here is because his name is on the strip.
Sunday November 02,
1997
Tags marketing dept, engineering dept, other engineers, careless mistake, need nets, rope, tranquilizer darts, askengineering
Transcript
Marketing Department: A guy walks by a table and says, "Hey! It's a magazine!" He reaches for it. Engineering Department: A loud speaker says, "Danger! A magazine has been discovered in marketing!" Alice looks scared. Alice pokes her head into Dilbert cubicle and says, "Marketing has a magazine!" Dilbert gasps and his hair stands on end. Dilbert heads for the War Room. He says, "Gather the other engineers. We must get that magazine." Alice says, "Check." Dilbert says to Alice, Asok and Wally, "We think is was a careless mistake by someone in the mail department." Dilbert says, "As you know, there is nothing more dangerous than a marketing person with a little bit of knowledge." Dilbert points to a diagram on the dry-erase board. He says, "We know where the magazine will be read. We need nets, rope and traquilizer darts." The marketing guy starts to enter the men's restroom as a darts flies towards his neck. He thinks, "I'll have to ask engineering to build one of these space staions..."
Saturday December 22,
2001
Tags important document, signed petition, nobel peace prize, sip, trade ya
Transcript
Ratbert says to Bob, the dinosaur, "Bob, I hold in my hands the most important document ever created." Ratbert continues, "It's a signed petition to end war. I expect to win the Nobel Peace Prize for this." Ratbert asks Bob, "May I have a sip of that?" Bob replies, "Trade ya."
Thursday March 21,
2002
Tags elbonians, classified ad, nuclear war head, russian craftsmanship, third world countries, slingshot, hundred yards
Transcript
Two Elbonians show up at Dilbert's house door. Dogbert opens. An Elbonian says, "We saw your classified ad for a nuclear warhead." Dogbert says, "It's genuine Russian craftsmanship, ideal for menacing other third-world countries." An Elbonian responds, "Sweet." An Elbonian holds the warhead and says, "Our slingshot can fling this a hundred yards. Is that enough?" Dogbert looks at their briefcase full of money and says, "That's plenty."
Friday January 28,
2005
Tags response to letter, apologize, admits error, starting war, mean spirit, hating minorities
Transcript
Carol: "Hey, I got a response from the newspaper columnist I reamed for misusing the word "dongle."" ""Dear Nutbag... Link to a dictionary..." Um... Oops... It appears that I was wrong." "Now do you apologize?" "Plan B: I accuse him of hating minorities."
Thursday July 21,
2005
Tags elbonia bid, nuclear war head, plans, internet, few things modified, ginat toaster, enriched bread, technology
Transcript
"We won the Elbonia bid, but I had to promise we'd give them plans to build a nuclear warhead." "Don't worry. I got the plans off the Internet and I modified a few things." "Now all we need is some highly enriched bread."
Wednesday July 12,
2006
Thursday August 21,
2008
Tags charitable giving, unintended consequences, hobo, east side, human flesh
Transcript
Dilbert says, "Our charitable giving has caused some unintended consequences." Dilbert says, "It sparked a hobo war. The east side of the city is in flames." The Boss says, "Well, it could be worse." Dilbert says, "They tasted human flesh, and they like it."
Saturday July 04,
2009
Sunday November 19,
2006
Transcript
First Date "Do you feel like doing some conversation?" "Okay. I love talking." "Do you like politics?" "No." "Science and technology?" "Not really." "War?" "No." "Sports?" "No." "Current events?" "No." "What's left?" "I like to talk about my hair." "Um...okay, we can try that." "This brown is a browner brown than I wanted." "Right. Are we done with hair?"


