Won Bid Comic Strips - Page 4

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

82 Results for Won Bid

View 31 - 40 results for won bid comic strips. Discover the best "Won Bid" comics from Dilbert.com.

Winning The Nasa Contract

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Winning The Nasa Contract - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #aliens, #attack, #communication, #earth, #space, #nasa

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: NASA has detected an alien probe heading for earth. We won the NASA contract to contact the aliens using a focused laser beam. Dilbert: Wouldn't that look to them like an attack? Boss: Maybe that's why do one else bid.

Fraud Presenter

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Fraud Presenter  - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business, #technology, #presentation, #incorrect, #fraud, #exposed, #resignation, #immediate, #meeting, #won

View Transcript

Transcript

co-worker making a presentation with graph. wally: is it a coincidence that the only part of your presentation i understand is also clearly wrong? co-worker: well, you caught me. i'm actually a fraud. i offer my resignation, effective immediately. goodbye. wally to dilbert: this is the first time i ever won a meeting. i have to say, it feels good.

Won Space Laser Bid

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #questioning, #shopping, #hardware, #powerpoint deck, #boss, #ambiguity, #mumbling, #change subject, #badger for answer, #too many questions

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: Can you look at this bid and let me know if I can order the hardware? Boss: yes. Dilbert: Are you saying yes I can order the hardware, or yes you'll look at it? Boss: Mumble mumble. Dilbert: What? Boss: I need your input on my Powerpoint deck. Dilbert: So far, in response to my request, you've given me ambiguity, mumbling, and a change of subject. Would you prefer that I badger you for an answer until you get angry, or should I return to my cubicle and resume being ineffective? Boss: You ask too many questions.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #joke, #pun

View Transcript

Transcript

The caption says, "Dogbert demonstrates the art of puns. Step #1: 'The Set-up.'" Dilbert sits in his chair and Dogbert sits on Dilbert's legs. Dogbert says, "Tell me again about your uncle the famous biologist." Dilbert says, "Uncle Albert won many awards for his work in breeding sea anemonies. Sadly, he had little time for a social life." The caption says, "Step #2: 'The Delivery' (from outside of swatting range)." Dogbert stands in the doorway and says, "With anemonies like that, who needs friends?"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dogbert, #trophy, #perfect, #attendance, #vicarouis, #dusting, #waxing, #head, #big head, #Dilbert

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert says to Dogbert, "Look what I won, Dogbert! It's a trophy for perfect attendance!" Dilbert says, "Since YOU've never won a trophy, I thought you might get some vicarious joy by dusting and waxing MY trophy every day. Here." Dilbert walks away saying, "I hope that trophy doesn't go to my head." Dogbert throws the trophy at Dilbert's head.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #television, #network, #reports, #stories, #Games, #yesterday, #millionaires, #problems, #darryl, #brain, #crime

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert sits at his desk. Dogbert says, "I'm going to start up a television news network that only reports happy stories." Dogbert sits at a news desk and says, "In sports, fifty percent of the teams won their games yesterday and all the players are millionaires - most of whom have no serious drug problems." Dogbert continues, "Our person of the week is Darryl, who, despite his tiny brain, found success through a life of crime." In the corner of the tv screen there is a picture of a man holding a bag of money and hugging a woman in front of a palm tree.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dogbert, #Dilbert, #lawsuit, #woman, #calculator

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert sits at his desk. Dogbert asks, "Does it bother you that I won fifty million dollars in my lawsuit, whereas you still toil to remain middle class?" Dogbert asks, "Does it bother you to know that I could buy and sell you . . How many times?" A woman with a calculator says, "834 times." Dogbert says, "Hey, it's gone up since lunch!"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #Dogbert, #science

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert and Dogbert sit at the table. Dilbert asks Dogbert, ". . . So I thought you might use some of your newly won millions to fund my 'Bioworld' science experiment." Dilbert shows Dogbert an illustration and explains, "It's a complete ecology enclosed in an airtight dome. The survival of the volunteers would depend on my foresight and engineering skills." Dilbert says, "Gee, I thought it would be harder to talk you into it." Dogbert says as he writes a check, "I get to pick the volunteers myself."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #computer, #ratbert, #Dilbert, #rat

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert sits at his desk. Ratbert says, "Yeah, I'd say that I've become a loved and respected member of the family." Ratbert continues, "Sure, you had some initial prejudice because I'm a rat, but love won out." Ratbert concludes, "So, I was thinking maybe there's a better way to leave little bits of cheese around the house for me." Ratbert's tail is stuck in a mouse trap.