Named Ted Comic Strips - Page 40

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506 Results for Named Ted

View 391 - 400 results for named ted comic strips. Discover the best "Named Ted" comics from Dilbert.com.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #positive attitude alice, #coworker, #paper weight, #throws at head, #clocks head, #positive attitude

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Alice works at her computer. The Boss says, "It's 'positive attitude week,' Alice." The Boss hands Alice a paperweight. The Boss says, "If you see a co-worker with a positive attitude..." The Boss says, "...give him the positive attitude paperweight." A man walks down the hall whistling, as Alice cocks her arm with the paperweight. Alice says, "There's one!" The paperweight glances of the man's head. Alice says to The Boss, "It worked. He's back to normal. The man says, "#$!!" Wally says, "Ha Ha Ha!!" Alice thinks, "Uh-oh." The man says, "#$!!" Alice says to the boss, "One more! Quick!!" The Boss covers his eyes in frustration.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #estate plan, #fastest worker, #flashback, #lawyer, #will, #legal

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i was the worlds fastest worker. My big mistake was becoming a lawyer, Flashback: Do you think I need an estate plan? Heres your will and heres my bill for 9 cents,

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #team building exercise, #security gurad, #middle of desert, #leave you there

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"Ted, I'm sending you on a team-building exercise." "A security guard will drive you to the middle of the desert and leave you there!" "And then the team will rescue me?" "Sure."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #concerns about work, #teds work, #team building exercise, #test here, #sent asok

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"I listened to your concerns about Ted's work, so I tricked him into being left in the middle of the desert." "He thinks it's a team-building exercise. Hee hee!" "We wanted you to transfer him, not kill him." "Really? This is awkward." "And this is Ted. Where's Asok?"

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"I did a background check and discovered that you embellished your resume." "For example, there's no college named 'The Einstein One.'" "And I'm reasonably certain that 'Smartology' isn't a real major."

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"Wally, I came to ask you for the new design specs." "But we both know you'll send me to someone who doesn't have them, and that person will refer me back to you." "When I return, you will have escaped to your secret hiding place." "Ted has the specs."

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Mordac, the preventer of information services<Br>"You have exceeded your e-mail storage limit!" "To increase your limit, you must get approval from your VP, the CIO, and one nonexistent person to be named later." "I'm thinking either a yeti or a bikini model who is also an engineer." erk!

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"Please don't tell Ted I said bad things about his project." "Okay." "Hey Ted, someone told me that your project is floundering!!!" gurk! "Act cool."

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This t-shirt goes to Ted for his work on the alpha project. "Your work was terrible. You're fired." IDIOT "It was frightening." "Were you scared shirtless?"

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I need some data from an unreachable guy named Ed. What should I do? "Just make up a bunch of data like everyone else does." "Everyone else does that?" "Are you doubting my data?"