Office Workers Comic Strips - Page 40
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1000 Results for Office Workers
View 391 - 400 results for office workers comic strips. Discover the best "Office Workers" comics from Dilbert.com.
Tuesday May 11,
2021
Bigoted Against Elbonian Men
Tags business, marriage, office workers, elbonia, report, bigot, irrelevant, innocence, prove, sale, flower
Transcript
catbert: i'm getting reports that you are bigoted against elbonian men. dilbert: i'm not. catbert: that is irrelevant. there is only one way to prove your innocence. elbonian man: yes, i'll marry you. dilbert holding out flower: i thought it would be a tougher sale.
Top Dilbert Searches
marketing, project, cloud, catbert, leadership, budget, birthday, engineer, time sheet, sales, wally, strategy, dogbert, powerpoint, project management, topper, leader, boss, change, meeting, data, management, mordac
Tuesday June 15,
2021
Low Self Esteem
Tags office workers, business, relationships, low, self-esteem, hate, performance, problem, hear, sarcasm
Transcript
employee: my low self-esteem is making me hate you for being good at your job. dilbert: that's not my problem. employee: oh, it will be. it will be. dilbert: was i suppose to hear that?
Wednesday June 16,
2021
Tina Is Late For Revenge
Tags business, office workers, late, meeting, punctual, three, minutes, plotting, revenge, sarcasm, october
Transcript
dilbert: you're late. tina: how do you like it? you were three minutes late that one time last october. dilbert: and you've been plotting your revenge since then? tina: it isn't weird
Thursday June 24,
2021
Insults By Email
Tags business, communication, office workers, insult, email, comfortable, belittle, Opinion, move away, sarcasm
Transcript
dilbert: i feel a deep need to belittle your opinion, but it would be awkward doing it in person. would you mind moving away from me so i can email you my insult? dilbert in hall by himself. dilbert: a little more....
Tuesday June 29,
2021
Disagreement Sides
Tags business, office workers, disagreement, Opinion, facts, agreement, sides
Transcript
tina: i'm having a disagreement with alice, and i want you to side with me. dilbert: how about i make up my own mind based on the facts? tina: that's not going to work for me.
Monday September 16,
1996
Tags pager vibrate, not wearing, classic case, phantom pager, technology workers, relocate it
Transcript
Dilbert lies on a couch in a therapist's office. Dilbert says, "On weekends I'll feel my pager vibrate . . . But when I go to check it, I realize I'm not wearing it." The psychologist replies, "It's a classic case of phantom-pager syndrome. It's common among technology workers." The psychiatrist adds, "There's no treatment for it." Dilbert says, "I don't want to treat it. I want to relocate it."
Monday January 04,
1999
Tags Catbert, director, co workers, sadistic, big nut, party, spinach dip
Transcript
Caption: Catbert: H.R. Director" Catbert has the sadistic nut in his office. Catbert says, "Your co-workers say you're a sadistic nut." Catbert says, "Gimme five, you big nut! and keep up the good work!" Catbert says, "Hey, I'm having a party on Saturday. Can you make it?" The sadistic nut says, "Sure! I'll bring my spinach dip."
Sunday April 08,
2001
Tags punish me, manage annual business plan, beg co workers, information, budget needs, lies, ignore you, underscoring unimportance, combine lies and guesses, ballof data, senior mangement, budget decions, magazine articles
Transcript
Asok is in the bosses office. Asok says, "Did you call me here to punish me?" The boss is sitting behind his desk. The boss says, "No, no, Asok. I want you to manage our annual business plan process." Asok says, "How so I do that?" The boss says, "First, you beg your co-workers for information about their budget needs." With a close-up on Asok, the boss continues off-frame "Half of them will give you lies. The other half will ignore you. Thus underscoring your unimportance." The boss continues, "Then you'll combine the lies and guesses into a worthless ball of data for senior management." Asok faces the boss as the boss says, "Then our CEO will make budget decisions based on magazine articles." Dilbert asks Asok, "How bad was the punishment?" Asok says, "Worse than I expected."
Saturday February 15,
2014
Tags crimes, revenge, difficult co workers, jerks, jar of polonium, deal with difficulty, office, Politics, registered, dog, stool, animals
Transcript
Dogbert: Today you'll learn how to deal with difficult co-workers. Jerks will always be jerks. Your only hope is to kill them in ways that are untraceable. Boss: We need to talk. Dogbert: Each of you got a jar of polonium when you registered.
Saturday October 24,
2015
New Office Layout Will Improve Efficiency
Tags layout, office, desk, work environment, efficiency, catch-22, loophole, laziness, excuse
Transcript
Wally: Do you really believe that your plan to change the office layout will boost efficiency? Boss: Of course it will. The physical environment makes a huge difference. Wally: Good. I missed all of my deadlines because of our current office layout is bad.

