Wait For Answer Comic Strips - Page 40

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

412 Results for Wait For Answer

View 391 - 400 results for wait for answer comic strips. Discover the best "Wait For Answer" comics from Dilbert.com.

Dilbert Gets A Mentor

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Dilbert Gets A Mentor - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #managers & supervisors, #Advice, #mentor, #productivity, #operations, #vice president, #pressure, #trick

View Transcript

Transcript

boss: i heard you asked our v.p. of operations to be your mentor. why didn't you tell me you needed some mentoring? i'm full of useful advice. dilbert: such as? boss: well... not you're putting me on the spot. it's hard to think of advice while you're pressuring me. maybe you could give me a scenario, and then i'll tell you what to do. dilbert: okay, suppose my boss is ruining my productivity by yammering about his great advice. what can i do? boss: that feels like a trick question. dilbert: our v.p. of operations could answer it.

Searching On A Phone

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Searching On A Phone - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #office workers, #communication, #phone, #protocol, #task, #rude, #technology, #insult, #fake

View Transcript

Transcript

tina: i have something funny to show you. just give me a minute to find it on my phone. dilbert thinking: what's the protocol in this situation? should i just sit here and stare at her pawing at her phone? i can't talk because she's focused on her task. and it would be rude to walk away. would it be an insult to look at my own phone and mentally check out from this useless interaction? tina: ah! i found it! dilbert: okay, good. tina: wait, that's not the right one. dilbert: is this why people fake their own deaths?

Data Can Only Mean One Thing

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Data Can Only Mean One Thing - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business, #office workers, #sarcasm, #data, #analyze

View Transcript

Transcript

ted: this data can mean only one thing. dilbert: actually, it can mean any one of about seventeen things. ted: then why can i think of only one? dilbert: please don't make me answer that.

Time Stands Still

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Time Stands Still - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business, #technology, #phone, #search, #time, #bored, #Win, #still

View Transcript

Transcript

dogbert: i discovered a way to make time stand still. dilbert: that isn't possible. dogbert: i'll prove it. i just need to find something on my phone and show it to you. looking... looking... here it is! wait... no, that isn't it. looking... looking... dilbert distressed: gaaa! i'm so bored watching you look through your phone!!! time is standing still! you win...and i hate you. dogbert: totally worth it.

Ceo Is Like Normal People

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Ceo Is Like Normal People - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #managers & supervisors, #business, #office environment, #cubicle, #work, #normal, #people, #respect, #stupid

View Transcript

Transcript

ceo: even though i am you ceo, i work out of a cubicle just like normal people. you probably respect that. alice: no, it sounds stupid. ceo: then why am i torturing myself in that putrid cubicle? alice: see prior answer.

Wally Prefers Systems

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Wally Prefers Systems  - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #managers & supervisors, #business, #office workers, #goals, #question, #answer, #system, #year

View Transcript

Transcript

dilbert: what are your goals for the year? wally: i prefer systems over goals. dilbert: okay, what are your systems? wally: none of them involve answering questions.

Dilbert Hates Safety

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Dilbert Hates Safety - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business, #safety, #anger, #yelling, #statistics, #flaw, #authority, #health

View Transcript

Transcript

dilbert: your method of calculating the safety statistics is flawed. monkey man: wow. wait until i tell everyone you don't think safety matters. dilbert: i...didn't say that. i'm talking about the way you measured it. monkey man yelling: it's too late to walk it back now! dilbert: i'm not "walking it back." i'm clarifying. monkey man: there's nothing to clarify, you hate safety. dilbert yelling and waving arms: stop putting words in my mouth!! i'm a better authority on what i think than you are!!! boss in hallway: what was all that yelling about? monkey man: dilbert thinks safety doesn't matter.

Smartphones Spread Viruses

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Smartphones Spread Viruses - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #cell phone, #hygiene, #science, #contagion, #pandemic, #smartphone, #germs

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: Scientists say our smartphones can spread the coronavirus. That's why I no longer answer the phone. You never know if the caller is infected. Asok: I don't think... Dilbert: Let it go.

Manage With Data

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Manage With Data - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #analysis, #business, #data, #face maks, #leadership, #manage, #managers & supervisors, #paralysis, #technology, #useable

View Transcript

Transcript

boss wearing face mask: we need to manage with data! dilbert wearing face mask: do we have any useful data? boss: not really. dilbert: so...actually we need to get data before we can use data. boss: we don't have time for your analysis paralysis! dilbert: i think you're taking both sides of the same argument. you insist on using data, but you don't want to wait for data. boss: it's called leadership. you wouldn't understand. dilbert: oh, i think i do. boss: stop being such a mask hole.

False Modesty

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
False Modesty  - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business, #universities & colleges, #education, #harvard, #false, #modesty, #major, #face mask

View Transcript

Transcript

dilbert wearing face mask: what college did you go to? colleague wearing face mask: i'd rather not say. dilbert: the only people who answer that way are people who went to harvard. do they teach you false modesty? colleague: it was my major.