Told Everyone Comic Strips - Page 40

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

505 Results for Told Everyone

View 391 - 400 results for told everyone comic strips. Discover the best "Told Everyone" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #wages, #salary, #secret, #anger, #compensation, #money, #unfair

View Transcript

Transcript

Catbert: You left a speadsheet with everyone salary in the copier. Boss: Oops. Catbert: By now, every employee has seen it. Boss: Should I be worried that it will lower morale? Catbert: No, I wouldn't worry about that. I would worry about heads exploding when they find out Wally has the highest pay in the department. Noise: Pow!!! Catbert: It's going to be a long week. Boss: Would you mind kicking that angry eyeball into the trash?

Wally Offended Everyone

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Wally Offended Everyone - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #offense, #offensive, #sensitivity, #political correctness, #politically correct

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: Wally, I"m getting reports that you have offended every single employee in this company in the past week. Wally: Have I offended you? Boss: No, I"m not a sensitive idiot like the rest of them. Wally: Doesn't that mean the problem is on their end? Boss: That doesn't matter as much as you think it should.

You Will Get Used To It

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
You Will Get Used To It - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #coworkers, #Politics, #disagreement, #Opinion, #flaw, #personality, #psychology

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: I can't assign you to a project team because everyone hates you for your political opinions. Wally: And they don't hate me for being useless in general? Boss: I guess we all got used to that. Wally: You'll get used to the other thing, too. Give it some time.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #failure, #blame, #executives, #scapegoat

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: Our sales for the quarter were zero. CEO: Heads will roll! Whose fault is this. Dilbert: It's entirely your fault. You told a reporter that our next version will be amazing. So all of our customers are waiting for the new version. The only sensible solution here is for you to admit your mistake and resign in utter humiliation. CEO: Or... I could blame this guy, whatever his name is. Man: That isn't right. CEO: Looks like I'll be adding insubordination to the charges.

Ted Complains About Dilbert

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Ted Complains About Dilbert  - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #budget, #money, #funding, #creativity, #embezzlement, #fraud

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: Ted is complaining that you charged your expenses to his project. Dilbert: You told me to be creative because you forgot to fund my project. Boss: I wasn't expecting you to do that. Dilbert: That's what makes it creative. I looked it up.

Imagine He Is Naked

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Imagine He Is Naked  - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #public speaking, #presentation, #Advice, #nervous, #naked, #fear

View Transcript

Transcript

Asok: Do you have any tips for my presentation to the CEO? Boss: When you are presenting, imagine you are naked and everyone is laughing at you. Asok: Why? Boss: It's just something I read. I might have the details wrong.

Dilbert's Project Is In Chaos

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Dilbert's Project Is In Chaos  - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #accusation, #hearsay, #conjecture, #gullible

View Transcript

Transcript

Man: I hear Dilbert's project is in total chaos. Boss: That has to be true because I heard it from three other people. Man: And that's why I told three other people.

Dogbert The Special Counsel

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Dogbert The Special Counsel - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #trump, #comey, #obstruction, #russia, #collusion

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: Everyone says you've been colluding with our Elbonian competitors. I've assigned a special counsel to review all of your email and phone logs. Dilbert: I've done nothing wrong. Dogbert: Stop trying to obstruct justice.

Two Choices For Work Space

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Two Choices For Work Space - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #office, #office workers, #cubicle, #distraction, #work from home

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: We're trying to decide if it's better to have an open office plan with too many distractions to be productive... or soul-crushing cubicles that will make every employee envy the dead. Dilbert: Maybe everyone can just work from home? Boss: And miss all of this?

Asok Is In Charge Of Cubicle Move

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Asok Is In Charge Of Cubicle Move - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #office, #office workers, #cubicle, #popularity, #power

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: Asok, I"m putting you in charge of deciding who gets which cubicle after the office redesign. Asok: But... everyone will hate me for deciding who gets the best cubicles. Boss: Try to see it as an upgrade to your current situation of no one caring about you. Asok: That helps a little.