Dilberts Moother Comic Strips - Page 40
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Dogbert stands in the door of Dilbert's bedroom. Dilbert sits up in bed as Dogbert says, "I'm having nightmares, move over." Dilbert lets Dogbert climb into bed and says, "Just don't hog all the covers." Dilbert stands next to the bed and says, "At least give me my pajama top . . ." All of the covers, sheets and pillows are wrapped around Dogbert who says, "Shhh . . ."
Bob and Dawn the Dinosaurs sit on the floor in front of Dilbert's chair. Dilbert says, ". . . So the theory that dinosaurs were destroyed when a giant meteor collided with earth . . ." Bob says, ". . . Was highly exaggerated." A dinosaur points at another dinosaur who lies underneath a meteor and says, "Ha ha, Larry! Ha ha!" Another animal says, "Nice catch." From underneath the meteor, Larry says, "Ouch!"
The caption says, "How to be boring: 'Great Things I Have Eaten' series." Dilbert sits in his chair and Dogbert sits on Dilbert's legs. Dilbert says, "But by far, the best baked potato I've ever eaten was six years ago . . ." The caption says, "The victim may try sarcasm to relieve the boredom." Dogbert says, "Fascinating, now could you think out loud all of the possible dates this may have occurred?" The caption says, "Sarcasm won't work." Dilbert says, "Well, it could have been on October 6th . . . Or maybe the 16th. Was that a Tuesday?"
Dilbert sits in his chair and Dogbert sits on Dilbert's legs. Dilbert says, ". . . And nature has a way of compensating for weakness." Dogbert asks, "Really?" Dilbert explains, "That's why blind people often develop great hearing." Dogbert says, "I guess that also explains why stupid people have big mouths."
Dilbert sits in his chair and the Grim Reaper sits on the hassock. Dilbert says, "So since my time ISN'T up, all you can do is wait around?" The Grim Reaper replies, "Basically." Dilbert says, "Well, as long as you're here, let me tell you about my recent trip to the Fresno Raisin Festival. It all started . . ." The Grim Reaper says as he leaves Dilbert's house, "My mistake. Guys like you live forever."
The caption says, "Dogbert demonstrates the art of puns. Step #1: 'The Set-up.'" Dilbert sits in his chair and Dogbert sits on Dilbert's legs. Dogbert says, "Tell me again about your uncle the famous biologist." Dilbert says, "Uncle Albert won many awards for his work in breeding sea anemonies. Sadly, he had little time for a social life." The caption says, "Step #2: 'The Delivery' (from outside of swatting range)." Dogbert stands in the doorway and says, "With anemonies like that, who needs friends?"
Dilbert sits in his chair and Dogbert sits on Dilbert's legs. Dogbert asks, "Did you ever think how lucky people are that their eyes are located on their heads?" Dogbert continues, "Suppose your eyes were on your ankles; you wouldn't be able to drive a car." Dilbert leaves. Dogbert continues, "Without cars, dating would be impossible. No dating, then no marriage. Soon the species would be extinct."
Dilbert sits in his chair and Dogbert sits on Dilbert's legs. Dilbert reads a magazine and says, "Wow! This survey says that a woman over 35 has the same odds of getting married as being killed by a terrorist." Dogbert asks, "Of the ones who do get married, how many marry terrorists?" Dilbert replies, "One in four." Dogbert says, "Gosh."
Dilbert sits in his chair and says, "Don't think of it as fetching, think of it as doing a favor for your best friend." As he leaves the room, Dogbert says, "It's still pretty degrading." Dogbert lifts up the bed covers and finds Dilbert's slippers. He thinks, "Grumble, grumble, grumble . . ." Dogbert says, "Uh oh! It looks like Mr. Hedge Clippers wants to speak to Mr. Slippers!" Dogbert hands Dilbert his shreaded slippers. Dogbert says, "Will you be needing your bathrobe too, O Great Master?"
Dilbert sits in his chair and Dogbert sits on Dilbert's legs. Dilbert says, "Look, Dogbert, give me one good reason why I shouldn't sign up for sky diving lessons." Dogbert replies, "Thud . . ." Dilbert says, "You mean 'thud . . . ouch!' or just 'thud?'"