Engineering Secret Comic Strips - Page 40

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

399 Results for Engineering Secret

View 391 - 399 results for engineering secret comic strips. Discover the best "Engineering Secret" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 30, 1990's comic on:


Tags #Dilbert, #micheal, #cover, #charge, #two, #bits, #computer, #program, #engineering

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: Uh-oh! I'm being sucked into my own computer program! I've always feared this... Michael: Hi, I'm Michael-- Michael Chip.

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 06, 1990's comic on:


Tags #pig, #capitalism, #process, #mud, #making, #communism, #elbonian, #elbonia, #Politics, #Dilbert

View Transcript

Transcript

An Elbonian asks Dilbert, "How do we know you came to Elbonia just to teach us capitalism?" Another man says, "Yeah . . . Maybe you came to steal our secret process for making mud!!" Dilbert asks, "Dirt and water?" As Dilbert stands in the distance, an Elbonian says, "He knows . . ." The pig says, "We'll have to kill him."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 28, 1990's comic on:


Tags #Dilbert, #engineering, #newsletter, #interesting, #pathos, #human, #drama, #Dogbert, #tissues

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert sits at his desk. Dilbert thinks, "I've got to make the engineering newsletter more interesting." Dilbert thinks, "It needs pathos and human drama." Dilbert reads from a printout, "How to cope with the loss of loved data . . ." Dogbert says, "Wait . . . I better get some tissues."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share February 11, 1990's comic on:


Tags #Dilbert, #corporate, #philosophy, #shoot, #messenger, #consulted, #engineering, #department, #launched, #ill-conceived product, #humiliated, #fired, #eileen, #document, #carpet

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert stands at the front of the room giving a presentation. A man sitting at the conference table says, "Be candid, Dilbert. We have a corporate philosophy that says we 'don't shoot the messenger.'" Dilbert replies, "Good." Dilbert points to a diagram and says, "Had you consulted with the engineering department, you never would have launched such an ill-conceived product." Dilbert continues, "It is doomed to fail. You will all be humiliated and probably fired." A woman holding a rifle shouts, "Can't I just wing him?!!" A man says, "No, Eileen, that's not our philosophy." Dilbert arrives at home with tar and feathers on his body. He tells Dogbert, "It turns out the corporate philosophy is a very flexible document." Dogbert says, "You're getting tar on the carpet."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 02, 1989's comic on:


Tags #Dilbert, #Dogbert, #mysteries, #china, #great wall of china, #armies, #engineering, #flop

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert and Dogbert sit outdoors. Dilbert says, "And another of life's mysteries is, why do they call it the 'Great Wall of China?'" Dilbert continues, "It never really kept any invading armies out . . . Kind of a dismal flop from an engineering perspective." Dogbert says, "I don't think 'The Dismal Flop of China' would have the same tourist appeal." Dilbert replies, "I wouldn't pay to see it."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 11, 1989's comic on:


Tags #Dogbert, #Dilbert, #perpetual motion club, #hand, #secret, #handshake

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert asks Dilbert, "How was your first meeting with the 'Perpetual Motion Club?'" Dilbert replies, "Great! I learned the secret handshake tonight." Dilbert sticks his hand out and says, "You stick your hand out and spin it around like this." Dogbert asks, "Then what?" Dilbert replies, "Then you just keep on doing it forever." Dogbert says, "That explains why you keep it secret."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 09, 1989's comic on:


Tags #aliens, #secret, #selfish

View Transcript

Transcript

Two aliens who look like cows travel toward earth in a spaceship. Dilbert sits at his desk. The doorbell rings. Dogbert says, "I'll get the door." Dogbert opens the door and sees the two aliens. One of the aliens says, "Greetings, earthling. We are an advanced race from the planet Moothron." The alien continues, "We came to share our secrets for ending hunger, poverty and disease." Dogbert asks, "What's in it for me?" The aliens look at each other. The aliens get in their spaceship and fly away. Dogbert sits on the hassock and says, "I'll always wonder if there was a better way to handle that."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 21, 1989's comic on:


Tags #book, #dog, #pet, #sick, #animals, #medical

View Transcript

Transcript

A woman walking down the sidewalk drops something. Dilbert bends over to pick it up and says, "Excuse me, miss!" The woman turns around and thinks, "Uh oh . . ." Dilbert says, "You dropped this little book titled 'Attractive Women's Secret Guide to Avoiding Dilbert.'" Dilbert says, "Wait a minute! I KNEW there had to be some kind of conspiracy!!" Dilbert opens the book and says, "If I can break this code, it will cripple their entire operation!" The woman shouts into a walkie talkie, "Mayday!!! Mayday!!!" Dilbert points at the woman and says, "Dogbert, sic!!!" Dogbert replies, "Sick? No, but my nose is a bit dry . . ."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 06, 1989's comic on:


Tags #construction, #sign, #road, #engineering

View Transcript

Transcript

As he drives his car, Dilbert wonders, "Gee, how could anybody be opposed to building more roads?" Dilbert continues, "Every time I see highway construction . . ." Dilbert continues, ". . . Some protestor has already put up a sign." Dilbert drives past an "End Construction" sign.