Managers Comic Strips - Page 40
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596 Results for Managers
View 391 - 400 results for managers comic strips. Discover the best "Managers " comics from Dilbert.com.
Friday November 13,
2015
Clarifying Our Strategies
Tags jargon, speaking, confusion, language, obliviousness, managers, fake, faking
Transcript
Boss: I hope that clarifies our strategy. Questions? Dilbert: From what you said, I can't tell if we're in the hardware or software business. Boss: We're B-to-B. Dilbert: How much do you with that meant something?
Sunday September 20,
2015
Tags managers & supervisors, credit, motivation, obliviousness, hiring, logic, business
Transcript
Boss: The secret to success is hiring the right people. Dilbert: Then why doesn't everyone do that? Boss: It takes a lot of skill to hire the right people. Dilbert: Did you just find a way to take all of the credit for the team's success? And did you do it in a clever way that was intended to make you look humble even while hogging all the credit? Boss: I also motivate you. Dilbert: You're money?
Wednesday September 16,
2015
Tina Gost Writes About Success
Tags managers & supervisors, humility, insult, humble, ghostwriter, biography, Advice, business
Transcript
Boss: Tina, a business publication asked me to write an article about success. I need you to ghostwrite it. Make me look wise, yet humble at the same time. Tina: "Hire employees that are smarter than you. In my case, that includes all adults, most children, and an alarming number of dolphins.
Wednesday July 22,
2015
Removing Obstacles
Tags hinder, hinderance, obstacle, obstacles, management, managers, insult, zinger, zing
Transcript
Boss: My job is removing obstacles. Asok: When do you leave? Dilbert: I think he was going in a different direction.
Tuesday June 23,
2015
Checking On Assumptions
Friday May 08,
2015
Celebrate Failure
Tags success, failure, credit, taking credit, reasoning, managers
Transcript
Boss: Failure is the raw material of success. From now on, I will celebrate your failures. Dilbert: Will you still be taking credit for our successes? Boss: That part stays the same. I'm only trying to increase the contrast to your failures.
Monday April 20,
2015
Brainstorm With Other Engineers
Tags product design, managers, marketing, simplicity, complication, inventions, ideas, business
Transcript
Boss: Our marketing people tell me your double-handed coffee mug could be a huge seller. Brainstorm with the other engineers and see if it needs more features. Wally: Do you have any other ideas for ruining the product, or should I focus on that one?
Monday April 13,
2015
Embellishing Resume At Work
Tags leadership, self-promotion, embellishment, managers
Transcript
Boss: One of my employees keeps embellishing his accomplishments. CEO: If he works in engineering, fire him. If he works in marketing, promote him. Boss: He doesn't work at all. CEO: Sounds like you have a leader on your hands.
Wednesday January 21,
2015
Dilbert Designs Flying Car
Tags business decisions, good ideas, ideas, innovation, inventions, managers, rejection, flying car, harvest ion, ion powered cars, selfie camera, sterring wheel
Transcript
Dilbert: I designed a flying car that harvests ions from the air to power itself. We can build them for only $3,000 apiece. CEO: There's no market for ion-powered flying cars. Dilbert: I can put a selfie camera in the steering wheel. CEO: Much better. And let' say the car does not fly.
Monday January 19,
2015
Hire People Smarter Than You
Tags insult, insulting, insults, intelligence, managers, obliviousness, Promotion, samrter, perfect manager
Transcript
Boss: Are you interested in becoming a manager? Dilbert: That would never work. Managers are supposed to hire people who are smarter than they are. That's easy for you, but how would I ever find anyone to hire? Boss: I don't understand. Dilbert: And that makes you the perfect manager.

