Ratbert As Intern Comic Strips - Page 40

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View 391 - 400 results for ratbert as intern comic strips. Discover the best "Ratbert As Intern" comics from Dilbert.com.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #cat, #not optimist, #phrased better, #rakberts head, #stomp on it, #yank off, #bob the dinosaur, #rat, #dog, #animals

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"Bob, I'll yank the cat off of Ratbert's head and you stomp on it!" "Yank" "Stomp" "I could have phrased that better." "I'm not an optimist anymore."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #animal eating rat, #feel lucky, #hat on head, #optimist

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"Ratbert the Optimist" "I feel lucky today." "Lucky, lucky, lucky" "I think a hat just blew onto my head!!"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #phone poll, #Dogbert, #voting twice, #each call costs, #money making, #opinions

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"People are so stupid they should pay me to listen to their opinions." "If you disagree, you can call my phone poll at 555-Dog-BERT. Each call costs two dollars." "I'm voting twice."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #ratbert, #filberts cubcile, #big eyes, #interested

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Ratbert: "I discovered I can look interested in what people say by making my eyes big." "Go ahead - say something. I'm ready." Dilbert: "I'm trying to get some work done here." Ratbert: "Work, you say? Very interesting."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #judges were cruel, #olympic competition, #play, #ratbert, #scored a two, #sofa, #doves, #rat on couch

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Ratbert: A hush comes over the crowd. This would be Ratbert's most difficult dive. Dilbert: I give it a two. Ratbert: The judges were cruel but rather captured the hearts aof the audience , endorsements would follow.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #market research, #market segment, #wild fungi, #pencil erasers, #head rubbed, #piece of paper

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"I'd like your opinion for my market research, Ratbert." "Me?!!" "I've lumped you in the market sgetment that includes wild fungi and pencil erasers." "Question one: would you enjoy having your head rubbed vigorously on a piece of paper?" "Who wouldn't?"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #areodynamic, #blow on me, #handy, #ratbert, #smart, #attractive

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Ratbert: I may not be smart and I may not be attractive... But I am Aerodynamic!! Dilbert: that night come in handy in a minute. Ratbert: Blow on me.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #philosophy of life, #gives you lemons, #big pitcher, #ice, #few glasses, #no napkins?

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Ratbert: "My philosophy is 'if life gives you lemons, make lemonade'." "Of course, the whole thing depends heavily on life also providing a big pitcher with ice and a few glasses." rather: "What? No napkins?!"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #ratbert, #birds and bees, #get stung, #birds, #humming bird, #sex with birds, #words to say

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Ratbert: "Dogbert told me about the birds and the bees." "The bee part confuses me. It seems like I'd get stung." "And as for birds, I just wouldn't know the words to say." Dilbert: "Try a humming bird."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #aa meeting, #ratbert, #fear of computers, #technophobe, #wrong meeting, #alcoholics anonymous, #interupt, #elaborate excuses, #avoid computers, #web of deception

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Ratbert: My name is Ratbert. I fear the information superhighway. Like most of you, my problem started because I never learned to type. I thought only secretaries needed to type. Then the computers came. At first I dismissed them as mere toys for men with no social skills. Soon they were everywhere. I would invent elaborate excuses to avoid computers. I was caught in my own web of deception. MAN: This is "alcoholics anonymous" Ratbert: I didn't interrupt you. Man: Can we talk about me now?