Team Building Pot Luck Comic Strips - Page 40

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402 Results for Team Building Pot Luck

View 391 - 400 results for team building pot luck comic strips. Discover the best "Team Building Pot Luck" comics from Dilbert.com.

Saving Babies

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Saving Babies - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 18, 2019's comic on:


Tags #business, #office, #office workers, #reputation, #fire

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dilbert: I have been cleared of all allegations against me, but where do i go to get my reputation back? dogbert: i recommend running into a burning building to save a baby. dilbert: what if no buildings are on fire? dogbert: have you heard of matches?

Go Hard Or Go Home

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Go Hard Or Go Home - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 31, 2019's comic on:


Tags #boss, #business, #inspirational quote

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the boss: your inspirational quote of the day is... next frame is outside of office building: "go hard or go home." the boss in empty conference room: i shouldn't have made it sound like a choice.

Winners Never Quit

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Winners Never Quit - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 01, 2019's comic on:


Tags #business, #office, #office workers, #sarcasm, #inspirational quotes

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the boss: i'm not having much luck with my inspirational quotes, but i thought i would try one more time. the boss: "winners never quit, and quitters never win." dilbert: when ted quit, you gave him a raise to stay. the boss: these work better when you don't think about them.

Lawyers Take Years

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Lawyers Take Years - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 21, 2019's comic on:


Tags #business, #lawyers, #office, #agreement, #years

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team meeting in conference room. dilbert: we can close the deal as soon as our lawyers tweak a few minor sentences in the agreement. the boss: how long will that take? dilbert: probably several years. the boss: what if i help them? dilbert: add 3 years.

Drooling Incompetents

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Drooling Incompetents - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 29, 2019's comic on:


Tags #business, #managers & supervisors, #office, #office workers, #competent, #incompetent

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wally at team meeting. wally: i've been asked to lead this project toward failure so my boss can convince our ceo to cancel it. wally: i'd like all of the competent people on the team to step aside, while the drooling incompetents who remain drive it into a ditch. office worker: how can we know who among us are the competent ones? wally: well, for starters, they don't ask that question.

Thanking Everyone By Name

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Thanking Everyone By Name - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 26, 2019's comic on:


Tags #business, #managers & supervisors, #name

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boss: i'd like to thank each member of the team by name...i'll start with what's-his-face here. voice from crowd: it's dilbert. boss: no, that's not it. you look like steve.

Poor Communication Skills

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Poor Communication Skills - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 08, 2019's comic on:


Tags #communication, #employees, #office, #office workers, #questions, #projects

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Man: Would you like to be on my project team? Dilbert: Hard pass. Your communication skills are so poor that the project is doomed to failure. Man: I meant to say your boss already assigned you to my project. Dilbert: We're off to a good start.

Manufacturing In Elbonia

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Manufacturing In Elbonia - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 24, 2019's comic on:


Tags #managers & supervisors, #business, #out source, #elbonia, #money, #government, #reputation

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boss: we're moving our manufacturing operations to elbonia to save money. dilbert: are you worried about elbonian government's reputation? boss: nah. i try to stay out of the weeds. dilbert: they're building concentration camps and rounding up dissenters. they intenionally poisoned a hundred thousand people in this country. they are habitual stealers of intellectual property, and they routinely ignore agreements they have signed. and they have a well-known goal of weakening other countries so they can dominate the world. boss: why can you just admit i'm saving money?

Adding Insult To Injury

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Adding Insult To Injury  - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 10, 2019's comic on:


Tags #business, #tech support, #customer, #calls, #interface, #reboot, #idiot

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boss: i hired the dogbert tech support team to help with customer calls because our user interface is so sadistic. dilbert: wouldn't that be adding insult to injury? boss: how so? dogbert in a office at a desk yelling: try rebooting, you idiot. and don't call again!

Magazine Article

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Magazine Article - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 26, 2019's comic on:


Tags #business, #publication, #salesman, #advertisement, #best, #company, #decision

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magazine salesman: our publication is considering naming your company one of the best places to work. on a totally unrelated topic, our sales team will be contacting you about buying lots and lots of advertisements. boss: and if we don't? magazine salesman: who would want to work at a company that makes such bad decisions?