Nose Job Comic Strips - Page 41
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991 Results for Nose Job
View 401 - 410 results for nose job comic strips. Discover the best "Nose Job" comics from Dilbert.com.
Wednesday May 25,
2005
Tags balancing work life, job anger, destablizie, crush urges, punch something, will want kids
Transcript
Dilbert: I'm having trouble balancing my work life and my personal life. How do you do it? Alice: "I use job anger to destabilize my hormonal blaance and crush any competing urges." "That reminds me I need to punch something today or I'll want to have kids."
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marketing, project, cloud, catbert, leadership, budget, birthday, engineer, time sheet, sales, wally, strategy, dogbert, powerpoint, project management, topper, leader, boss, change, meeting, data, management, mordac
Friday June 03,
2005
Tags freeze n expenses, freeware version, readily available, coffee sipping, noises
Transcript
I couldn't buy the software I need to do my job because of your freeze on expenses. "And our I.S. policy says I can't use the freeware version that is readily available." "So I used the week to develop some new coffee-sipping noises."
Friday June 10,
2005
Wednesday June 15,
2005
Tags paying for consulting, no recommendations, feel secure, shaping strategies, hate you, feel good
Transcript
"I keep paying you for consulting, but you never make any recommendations." "I'm what you call a "feel good."" "My job is to make you feel secure in the knowledge that someone brilliant is shaping your strategies." "This is weird; I hate you, but at the same time I feel good." "You're welcome."
Saturday July 16,
2005
Tags cure for cold, side effects, coughing, store throat, runny nose, congestion, nausea
Transcript
"I invented a cure for the common cold." "The possible side-effects are coughing, sore throat, runny nose, congestion and nausea." "So...it's a pill that makes you nauseous?" "Only if you have a cold."
Wednesday August 03,
2005
Tags my hat, can't see, perfect for job, reverse psychology, potentail jumpers
Transcript
"I understand that you have an opening for a negotiator who deals with potential jumpers." "I can't see you because my hat is in the way, but you sound perfect for the job." "Your reverse psychology didn't work." "What reverse psychology?"
Saturday August 27,
2005
Tags stealth layoff, evil director, human resources, worthless employees, job no longer exists, business
Transcript
Catbert: Evil Director of Human Resources "I call it a stealth layoff." "We move all of the worthless employees to the same project. When it's done, we tell them that their jobs no longer exist." "I don't like the look of this."
Sunday August 28,
2005
Tags new director, wist decision support, out source contracts, north elbonia, government reward
Transcript
"My job could not be more meaningless." "I'm looking at my new Director of Post-Decision Support!" "After I make a decision, your job is to figure out why it was the right one." "Save those tears of joy for later. We've got work to do!" "SOB!" "I decided to outsource our nuclear contracts to North Elbonia." "And in return, they'll give us food, if they ever figure out how to grow any." "I expect some fallout from this decision." "Me too." "On the plus side, it won't be long before there's a government reward for killing him."
Friday September 02,
2005
Tags employees, the boss, asok, projects, new, challenge, tina, write, newsletter, worthless, assistant
Transcript
I have completed all of my projects and I am ready for a new challenge. "You can help Tina write the department newsletter." "But the newsletter job is only given to the most worthless employee." "And her assistant."


