Young Employees Comic Strips - Page 41

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

581 Results for Young Employees

View 401 - 410 results for young employees comic strips. Discover the best "Young Employees" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 17, 2008's comic on:


Tags #dress code, #office, #office workers, #company shirts, #casual freidays, #lower self esteem, #stop complaining, #industry average, #feel overpaid

View Transcript

Transcript

Catbert: I modified the dress code to require wearing company shirts on casual Fridays. That should lower our employees' self-esteem until they stop complaining about earning less than the industry average. Dilbert: Why do I feel overpaid today?

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 03, 2008's comic on:


Tags #appreciation, #lunch, #employee appreciation lunch, #$35 a piece, #one isn't paying, #figured out

View Transcript

Transcript

The boss: Okay, the bill for the employee appreciation lunch comes out to $35 apiece. Alice: That only adds up if one of us isn't paying. The boss: The employees figured out why I appreciate taking them to lunch.

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 30, 2008's comic on:


Tags #boss, #dehumanizing, #easier to downsize, #employees, #insulting nickname, #meeting, #osama, #rudeness, #enemy, #business

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss says, I have assigned a secret insulting nickname to each of you." The Boss says, "It's my way of dehumanizing the enemy so it will be easier to downsize you." Ted says, "The enemy?" The Boss says, "That's enough out of you, Osama."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share February 02, 2010's comic on:


Tags #meeting, #letter, #ceo, #reading, #good fortune, #share, #winery, #wine, #angry, #helicopters, #human chess board, #frighten, #dwarves, #business

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss says, "Our CEO wants to share his good fortune with all employees." The Boss says, "He invites all of you to visit his winery and buy his non-award-winning wine at nearly retail prices." The Boss says, "He asks that you not park your helicopters near his human chess board because it frightens the dwarves."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 08, 2010's comic on:


Tags #customer, #meeting, #attractive woman, #shake hand, #handsome man, #translate, #business

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss says, "The customer is an attractive young woman. You'll need to bring a handsome man with you to translate." The Boss says, "The translator will repeat everything you say, word for word, but he'll say it more handsomely." Dilbert says, "Hi." Customer says, "What's he jabbering about?"

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 08, 2010's comic on:


Tags #consultant, #role model, #angry, #sociopath, #annoyed, #business

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert says, "You're doing a great job as a role model." Dogbert says, "Half of your employees have already turned into pudgy sociopaths." Dogbert says, "And they're quick to anger."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 11, 2010's comic on:


Tags #office, #Environment, #risks, #mistakes, #fist, #hard job

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss says, "My job is to create an environment where employees feel safe taking risks." The Boss says, "My other job is punishing employees who make any kind of mistake." The Boss says, "My point is that I'm glad I don't have your job."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 06, 2009's comic on:


Tags #meeting, #conversation, #cruelty, #ridicule, #business

View Transcript

Transcript

The boss says, "I gave the same assignment to all the employees who look like you." The boss says, "A blind squirrel is more likely to find a nut if there are a lot of blind squirrels." the boss says, "That sounded cruel allow me to rephrase it." the boss says, "I meant vision-impaired squirrels."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 30, 2009's comic on:


Tags #interview, #hiring, #policy, #cruelty

View Transcript

Transcript

the boss says, "You're hired, but company policy requires me to post the job opening internally before it's official." Man says, "Are you saying your company policy requires you to lie to employees and give them false hope?" The boss says, "Exactly." Man says,. "That's cruel." The boss says, "In six months you'll wish you had some false hope too."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 13, 2009's comic on:


Tags #economy, #fear, #policies, #evil, #cruel

View Transcript

Transcript

Catbert says, "The employees are scared shirtless about losing their jobs." Catbert says, "This is a good time to cut their benefits and roll out some Draconian corporate policies." Dilbert says, "'In the event of a bomb threat, the employees are expected to shield the servers with their bodies.'" Wally says, "I miss my shirt."