Office Politics Comic Strips - Page 42
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1000 Results for Office Politics
View 411 - 420 results for office politics comic strips. Discover the best "Office Politics" comics from Dilbert.com.
Monday July 16,
2007
Tags elbonian branch, in my own country, see you inperson, mud, work long hours, wear dockers
Transcript
The Boss: I'll be managing the Elbonian branch office but I'll be based in my own country. "I'll never see you in person but I want you all to work long hours and wear Dockers." "What is he doing?" Elbonian: "Sometimes we use mud to muffle laughter."
Wednesday August 08,
2007
Tags spreadsheet, terrible job, boos, meeting, office, poorly conceived, complexity of real world, wrong cells, numbers don't lie, business
Transcript
The Boss: "Asok, according to my spreadsheet, you have been doing a terrible job." Asok: "Perhaps your spreadsheet is poorly conceived and does not capture the complexity of the real world." "And let's not forget the near certainty that your formulae are pointing to the wrong cells." The Boss: "Numbers don't lie."
Saturday August 11,
2007
Tags dogbert for president, terrorits, skull, salad bowls, steal money, vote, pollution has viatamins, lies, fabrications, intimidations, Politics
Transcript
Dogbert for President "Vote for me or the terrorists will use your skulls for salad bowls." "I promise to take money from the people who don't vote for me and give it to the people who do." "Pollution has vitamins!" "I like how he makes me feel."
Wednesday September 05,
2007
Tuesday September 25,
2007
Tags donate, campaign, drill for oil, opppenets lawn, bureau of alcohol tobacco firearms, Politics
Transcript
Dogbert: "donate to my campaign, and I'll let you drill for oil in my opponent's lawn." "And I'll appoint you to run the bureau of alcohol, tobacco and firearms." Man: "Is that as fun as it sounds?" Dogbert: "Not for your neighbors."
Tuesday November 20,
2007
Tags borrow pen, need pen, order pen, order pens, parasitic arrangement, supplies, stingy, selfish, dysfunctional offcie, office supplies, fill out form
Transcript
Dilbert: "Can I order some pens?" Carol: "No, it's impossible." "You need a pen to fill out the pen request form. And if you have a pen, you're not allowed to order one." Dilbert: "Maybe I could borrow your pen." Carol: "That sounds like some sort of parasitic arrangement."
Sunday November 25,
2007
Tags boss, worker, office, wrong path, precise verbal explanation, embarrassment of undoing, good plan, progress, mistreatment of workers, corrupt policices, bad boss
Transcript
The Boss: "Dilbert, I need you to do something, but I don't have time to fully explain it." "I'll give you just enough information to send you down the wrong path." "Later, after you do it wrong. I'll treat you like you're some sort of idiot." "Then I'll put you through the embarrassment of undoing everything you did." "This might not sound like a good plan to you." "But it takes the task off of my plate and puts it on yours." "That's called progress." Dilbert: "Today I helped make progress." Garbageman: "Better luck tomorrow."
Wednesday December 19,
2007
Tags disciuss company politics, career monefield, project, new strategic direction, upcoming reorganization, plan to criticize, something good happens
Transcript
The Boss: "I'm not allowed to discuss the company politics that form a career minefield around your project." "And I can't tell you the company's new strategic direction, or anything about our upcoming reorg." The boss: "My plan is to criticize you until something good happens."
Wednesday January 02,
2008
Tags day off, empty office, holiday, loser, new years day, work, worked
Transcript
Tina: What did you do for New Year's Day? Dilbert: I forgot it was a holiday and came to work for ten hours." Tina: That's sort of loserish. Dilbert: Thanks for labeling it.
Tuesday January 15,
2008
Tags corner, cubilce, door, fantasy, nutrients, office, replacement, giant mushroom
Transcript
The Boss: Now that you're out of the loop, your new cubicle will be a giant mushroom. It's a pleasant environment except when the mushroom gets its nutrients. wally: Nutrients?


