Technical Talk Comic Strips - Page 42
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479 Results for Technical Talk
View 411 - 420 results for technical talk comic strips. Discover the best "Technical Talk" comics from Dilbert.com.
Sunday November 27,
2016
Tags #logic, #reasoning, #laziness, #work ethic, #excuse, #chaos theory
Transcript
Woman: When will you finish the technical review? Wally: That will depend on a variety of unknowns. A lot can happen between now and whenever you imagine I might be done with it. No one knows the future. I'd be a liar if I said I did, and you don't want a co-worker who is a liar, do you? Or do you? Woman: Lying would be better than whatever this is. Wally: In that case, I'll have it tomorrow.
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Tuesday January 03,
2017
Technical Debt
Tags #deadline, #stress, #pressure, #coding, #programmer, #mistake, #technology
Transcript
Boss: Did you finish the software yet? Dilbert: No, I'm still paying off the technical debt from the last programmer you rushed. Boss: I don't know what that means. Dilbert: Well, that explains a lot.
Tuesday January 10,
2017
Ted Is Doing A Terrible Job
Tags #talking, #conversation, #boring, #annoy, #quitting, #boredom
Transcript
Boss: Ted is doing a terrible job. Catbert: Maybe you should talk to him. Boss: What should I say? Catbert: It doesn't matter. Five minutes of listening to you will make him want to quit. Boss: That's crazy enough to work. Catbert: You've only been here for two minutes and my tail is asleep.
Monday January 16,
2017
Rather Eat Garbage
Tags #choosing, #choices, #boredom, #listening, #trash, #garbage, #suffering
Transcript
Wally: Would you rather eat garbage or listen to our boss talk about his weekend? Dilbert: I'd have to know more about the garbage to make that decision. Wally: Let's say it's mostly kitchen stuff. Dilbert: Am I eating it from the can or fighting birds for it?
Friday January 27,
2017
Boss Tweets Fake News
Tags #conversation, #mobile (cell) phones, #talk, #window
Transcript
The department of education asked us to talk to you about all of your tweeting. You tweeted so much fake news that the average I.Q. in the country plunged seven points. That doesn't hurt anyone. You tweeted "seat belts are designed to strangle survivors so they won't sue."
Wednesday February 01,
2017
Robot Lawyer Has Comments
Friday February 24,
2017
Taking Pride In Work
Tags #motivation, #pep talk, #logic, #pride, #suffering, #work ethic
Transcript
Boss: Wally, I"m starting to think you don't take pride in your work. Wally: That would be like taking pride in being the victim of a crime. Catbert: How'd the pep talk go? Boss: He made some good points.
Tuesday March 07,
2017
Tina Won't Stop Talking
Tags #conversation, #company policy, #politeness, #etiquette, #time, #talking
Transcript
Dilbert: Our new politeness policy is having unintended consequences. I just spent four hours listening to Tina talk about hear health problems because the company says it is rude to just walk away. Wally: How did you escape? Dilbert: She had a health problem. I got lucky.
Wednesday March 08,
2017
Honest Opinion But Polite
Tags #criticism, #political correctness, #politically correct, #company policy, #honesty
Transcript
Dilbert: Our new politeness policy forbids me from giving you an honest opinion of your idea. So, instead, I will talk about an unrelated topic and you can draw your own conclusions. So... did you hear about the manure fire that burned down a pig farm?
Thursday March 09,
2017
No Texting At Work
Tags #politeness, #etiquette, #company policy, #communication, #distraction, #social media, #conversation, #interaction, #technology
Transcript
Dilbert: The company's new politeness policy forbids you from texting while I am trying to talk to you. Alice: I'm not using a texting app. I'm replying to people on social media. Dilbert: You're missing the point. Alice: When did my happiness stop being the point?