Ted Comic Strips - Page 43
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Character
429 Results for Ted
View 421 - 429 results for Ted comic strips. Discover the best "Ted" comics from Dilbert.com.
Saturday January 18,
2020
Poison Pill
Tags #co-worker, #cross-train, #business, #relationship, #training, #bad, #fire, #poison pill, #planner
Transcript
dilbert: i can't shake the feeling that you are intentionally doing a bad job training me how to do your job functions. ted: i'm omitting important steps, so you'll fail hard should i get fired and you are asked to fill in. it's called a "poison pill." dilbert: you're a good planner.
Saturday January 25,
2020
Data Can Only Mean One Thing
Tags #business, #office workers, #sarcasm, #data, #analyze
Transcript
ted: this data can mean only one thing. dilbert: actually, it can mean any one of about seventeen things. ted: then why can i think of only one? dilbert: please don't make me answer that.
Friday February 14,
2020
Bias For Action
Tags #managers & supervisors, #sarcasm, #co-workers, #business, #meeting, #prototype, #bias
Transcript
Co-workers around meeting table. Ted: our pointy-haired boss told us to scrap our prototype and start over from scratch. dilbert: o was in that meeting and he said nothing like that. maybe we should verify what he wants. ted: or... we could have a bias for action!
Saturday February 15,
2020
Before Or After Firing
Tags #business, #managers & supervisors, #prototype, #request, #fire
Transcript
dilbert: we destroyed all of the prototypes you requested. boss: i never asked for anything remotely like that. dilbert: ted said you did. boss: did he tell you that before or after i fired him last week?
Wednesday March 18,
2020
Diet Preferences
Tags #conference room, #office workers, #chitchat, #bore, #diet, #preferences
Transcript
dilbert thinking as walking into conference room: oh, no. i'm here too early. there will be chitchat. dilbert sitting empty conference room: someone is going to bore me to death talking about their diet preferences. ted: i only eat figs. dilbert thinking: kill me. kill me. kill me.
Thursday June 25,
2020
Getting Opinions
Tags #office workers, #technology, #input, #dumb, #human, #universe, #Opinion, #strategy, #worse
Transcript
boss: get ted's input before you finalize the plan. dilbert: ted is the dumbest human being in the known universe. his opinion can only make things worse. boss: that's how we do it here. dilbert: i didn't realize it was a strategy.
Tuesday November 03,
2020
Boss Bluffs On Blockchain
Tags #business, #managers & supervisors, #technology, #blockchain, #byte, #code, #consensus, #bluff
Transcript
boss in meeting: i'm no expert on blockchain, but i think... we need to get the evm stack on the bytecode so we don't run into a consensus fork. boss to ted: did that mean anything? ted: don't ask me. i'm bluffing too.