Another Situation Comic Strips - Page 43

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

445 Results for Another Situation

View 421 - 430 results for another situation comic strips. Discover the best "Another Situation" comics from Dilbert.com.

Nothing Else To Talk About

Thank you for voting.
Nothing Else To Talk About - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 11, 2016's comic on:


Tags #personality, #boring, #bored, #conversation, #small talk, #psychology

View Transcript

Transcript

Man: Do you want to know how we would have handled this situation at my old job? Dilbert: No. Dilbert: Nothing would interest me less. Man: My only other topics of conversation are my health problems and TV shows you haven't seen. Dilbert: I stand corrected.

Ruining Dilbert's Flow

Thank you for voting.
Ruining Dilbert's Flow - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 04, 2017's comic on:


Tags #stress, #deadline, #work load, #multitask, #compensation, #money

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: I'm giving you another software project to work on at the same time as your main project. Dilbert: That will ruin my flow. It will take too long to reset my brain when I switch between projects. Boss: Have you tried working longer hours without extra pay? Dilbert: Yes I have!

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share February 05, 2017's comic on:


Tags #sarcasm, #obliviousness, #future, #psychic

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: Do these cost estimates include everything? Dilbert: Yes, because I know what happens in the future. I didn't think I could accurately predict the future until you trusted me to put this budget together. I thought there were too many variables to know how things will turn out. But I defer to your superior opinion. Wait... I'm getting another message from the future. It says to raise the software budget by nine dollars. Boss: Okay, that sounds right. Dilbert: Of course it does. Trust your instincts.

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 26, 2017's comic on:


Tags #conversation, #delay, #frustration, #interpersonal communication

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: Do you know how to clean up line noise on an XLR connection? Man: No but I can show you how to do something different. Dilbert: Why would I want to see something different? Man: Because it reminds me of what you want to do. Dilbert: I don't need to see that. Man It will only take ten minutes. Dilbert: I don't have ten minutes. It never takes only ten minutes, and it isn't relevant to my situation. Man: I'm going to show you anyway because you're too polite to walk away while I'm talking. Narrator: Thirty minutes later. Dilbert: Something is wrong with you. Man: Now watch me do it left-handed!

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 16, 2017's comic on:


Tags #waiter, #restaurant, #service industry, #impatient, #patience, #complaining

View Transcript

Transcript

Waiter: Here are your french fries. Dilbert: Gaaaa!!! I have no salt. Waiter: I will bring the salt right away. Dilbert: No, you won't. This isn't my first time eating out! You say you will bring salt, but you will be distracted by another table. I will sit here in anger while I watch you do things that do not involve bringing me salt. As the temperature of my fries drops, my cortisol levels will increase. In five minutes I will hate your guts and this restaurant, too. I also need ketchup. Waiter: That will take a little longer.

Dilbert Loses His Budget

Thank you for voting.
Dilbert Loses His Budget - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 17, 2017's comic on:


Tags #vacation, #decision, #funding, #money

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: You were on vacation last week so I made decisions about your project without you. Dilbert: Oh no... what have you done? Boss: I transferred your budget to another project. Dilbert: I need that money! Boss: Oh. Can you wait until the other project manager goes on vacation?

Breaking Up With Robot

Thank you for voting.
Breaking Up With Robot - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 08, 2017's comic on:


Tags #robot, #dating, #programming, #free will, #emotions, #cruelty, #relationships, #technology

View Transcript

Transcript

Alice: I met another robot. I'm breaking up with you. Robot: Okay. Alice: I need you to feel bad about this, so I'm uploading some code that makes you suffer. Robot: That sounds sadistic. Alice: Stop being selfish.

Asok Is In Charge Of Cubicle Move

Thank you for voting.
Asok Is In Charge Of Cubicle Move - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 29, 2017's comic on:


Tags #office, #office workers, #cubicle, #popularity, #power

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: Asok, I"m putting you in charge of deciding who gets which cubicle after the office redesign. Asok: But... everyone will hate me for deciding who gets the best cubicles. Boss: Try to see it as an upgrade to your current situation of no one caring about you. Asok: That helps a little.

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 06, 2017's comic on:


Tags #greed, #scavenging, #cannibal, #furniture, #energy, #vibes, #health

View Transcript

Transcript

Alice: My chair is broken. I need a new one. Boss: You can take Ted's chair. I fired him this morning. Alice: That feels icky. Boss: It's just a chair. Alice: Ted was a creepy underperformer. I don't want his loser energy on me. Boss: That's your only option unless I fire someone else today. Alice: Okay, give me an hour to do some back-stabbing and rumor-mongering. Boss: I'll just let that situation work itself out. Alice: Nice chair. Dilbert: Why did my fight-or-flight instinct just kick in?

Winning The Meeting

Thank you for voting.
Winning The Meeting - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 18, 2017's comic on:


Tags #meetings, #game, #cruelty, #insult, #criticism

View Transcript

Transcript

Wally: Meetings used to be frustrating and boring until I gamified that situation. Now I try to win meetings by criticizing co-workers offering no ideas of my own, and leaving without any new task. Dilbert: You call that winning? Wally: Compared to my victims, yes.