Ted Comic Strips - Page 43
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Character
448 Results for Ted
View 421 - 430 results for ted comic strips. Discover the best "Ted" comics from Dilbert.com.
Tuesday October 08,
2019
Test Device Analogy
Tags office workers, technology, power drill, test, device, analogy, office
Transcript
dilbert: i designed the test device to be held like one would hold a power drill ted: that's stupid. that product can't drill a hole in anything ceo: good point dilbert: that's... not... how analogies work. ted: and what if i don't need to drill anything? ceo: yeah!
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marketing, project, cloud, catbert, leadership, budget, birthday, engineer, time sheet, sales, wally, strategy, dogbert, powerpoint, project management, topper, leader, boss, change, meeting, data, management, mordac
Wednesday October 09,
2019
Your Real Scheme
Tags office workers, office, business, scheme, power, costs, mind, reader, psychology
Transcript
dilbert: and this method will reduce costs by thirty percent. ted: nice try, but i know your real scheme is to grab power. dilbert: you're not a good mind reader ted: and yet i knew you would say i can't read minds, explain that
Tuesday October 22,
2019
Best Employees
Tags employees, managers & supervisors, best, office workers, industry, attitude
Transcript
boss: we have the best employees in the entire industry. except for ted obviously. ted: wait...what? boss: and here comes the attitude.
Saturday October 26,
2019
Self Reliant
Tags managers & supervisors, business, project, teamwork, help, teach, self-reliant
Transcript
boss to wally: ted says you wouldn't help him on his project. wally: i was teaching him how to be self-reliant. that's important too, isn't it? not such an easy question, is it?
Monday October 28,
2019
Business Agility Influencer
Tags office workers, business, agility, solution, meaningless, useless
Transcript
ted: hi, i'm a business agility influencer and solutionist wally: i don't think that means anything ted: why are you the first person to spot that? wally: because i'm useless too!
Wednesday December 11,
2019
Saying You Are Dumb
Tags business, job, change, technology, dumb, imply, product
Transcript
dogbert's tech support ted: i can't figure out how to use your product. what should i do? dogbert: i recommend changing jobs to something less challenging. ted: are you saying i'm dumb? dogbert's once from phone: no. no. no. i'm only implying it.
Friday January 17,
2020
Cross Training
Tags co-workers, business, cross train, fire, job, dumb, manager
Transcript
dilbert: our pointy-haired boss told me to ask you to cross-train me on your job junctions. ted: that sounds exactly like he plans to fire me as soon as you can do my job. dilbert: in my defense, he assured me you would be too dumb to realize that.
Saturday January 18,
2020
Poison Pill
Tags co-worker, cross-train, business, relationship, training, bad, fire, poison pill, planner
Transcript
dilbert: i can't shake the feeling that you are intentionally doing a bad job training me how to do your job functions. ted: i'm omitting important steps, so you'll fail hard should i get fired and you are asked to fill in. it's called a "poison pill." dilbert: you're a good planner.
Saturday January 25,
2020
Data Can Only Mean One Thing
Tags business, office workers, sarcasm, data, analyze
Transcript
ted: this data can mean only one thing. dilbert: actually, it can mean any one of about seventeen things. ted: then why can i think of only one? dilbert: please don't make me answer that.
Friday February 14,
2020
Bias For Action
Tags managers & supervisors, sarcasm, co-workers, business, meeting, prototype, bias
Transcript
Co-workers around meeting table. Ted: our pointy-haired boss told us to scrap our prototype and start over from scratch. dilbert: o was in that meeting and he said nothing like that. maybe we should verify what he wants. ted: or... we could have a bias for action!

